It’s generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for music and sport, and others are not

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing It’s generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for music and sport, and others are not

  • linqi
    University: jinan university
    Nationality: china
    August 30, 2020 at 2:19 pm

    It’s generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for music and sport, and others are not. However, it’s sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.

    The discussion about one’s gift and training is always a heated topic. Some people are given certain gift when they come to the world, while some ordinary people are trained to be specialized in different aspects, for instance, sports and music. This essay will discuss both of the views.

    Obviously, the education systems are based on the belief that all children can effectively be taught to acquire different skills, including those associated with sports, art or music. So from our own school experience, we can find plenty of evidence to support the view that a child can acquire these skills with continued teaching and guided practice.

    However, some people argue that being equipped with innate talent is more likely to result in one’s success in the corresponding aspect. Compared with someone who devotes oneself in some area, the one with gift can easily acquire the same achievement without training hard. One excellent example for this is Lebron James, the great player in NBA. The main reason that he is of capacity to lead the league for so many years depends on his amazing strength and splendid fitness, with which he was born. In other words, there is more to the skill than a learned technique, and this extra talent cannot be taught, no matter how good the teacher or how frequently a person practices.

    Therefore, I believe that though individuals can be taught particular skills, but to become really representative in some area, one’s talent may be an necessary part.

    September 3, 2020 at 1:05 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 70% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 40% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. Rewrite the introduction, do not just restate the question. Instead make your argument clear, which side will you argue for, and why?
    4. Article errors
    5. Preposition errors
    6. Singular versus plural errors

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    September 3, 2020 at 6:16 pm

    Some athletes or musicians can have excellent performance on the stage due to their great talents. But some people believe that scientific and hard training can force a ordinary person to be as well as the talented ones. From my opinion, good exercises is unnecessary to better performance, but one’s gift decide his/her limit in the field.

    The meaning of education systems are based on the belief that all children can effectively be taught to acquire different skills, including those associated with sports, art or music. So from our own school experiences, we can find plenty of evidences to support the view that a child can acquire these skills with continued teaching and guided practice.

    However, from what I have seen, even with hard and perfect training, it is not very likely that a person could have the same capability as the talent platers. One excellent example to this is Lebron James, one of the greatest players in NBA. The main reason that he is capable to lead the league for so many years depends on his amazing strength and fitness, which he was born with. Compared to this, a number of players worked hard to improve their techniques. But at last they suffered from different diseases, affecting their career negatively. In other words, sometimes there is more to the gift than a learned skill, and this extra talent cannot be taught, no matter how good the teacher or how frequently a person practice.

    Therefore, I believe that though individuals can obtain fine skills. There are many examples of it, but if you look at the top stars in various fields, you will find out most of them are born with talents.

    September 3, 2020 at 6:49 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 55% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. Lots of grammatical errors.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.