It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

  • wendyliu
    University: TUC
    Nationality: China
    August 19, 2019 at 9:59 am

    TOEFL Writing Topic: It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

    We have been told that a man will never be too late to learn and learning is a life-long matter. But there are some disagreements when it comes to the exact content that people, especially students, should learn. Some people believe that understanding ideas and concepts is more important than learning facts, and the others hold the opposite view. From my own perspective, learning facts is the essential process of understanding abstract concepts and great ideas. I mean, without learning facts, students can never fully understand how the concepts and ideas work.

    In school, we learn many concepts and ideas from masterpieces of famous human beings, like scientists and artists, but it only completes half part of learning process. By knowing the application and cases of those concepts in real situation, students obtain deeper understanding and manage to use it properly. When we come upon the stage, at that time nobody teach us concept any more. We only learn facts from our practice, or more often our mistakes. It will be a bit late for us to learn, because many mistakes will be made in the process of exercising methods. We will realize by then that we should have learnt those facts when we are students.

    Most of knowledge exists for application. Taking law as an example, students cannot understand a legal concept or term properly until putting it into a real case and considering it under our social background. Just remembering the words is never enough for a law student. Instead, they need to read cases and use it repeatedly in their career. After practicing a few times, until this they can be sure of understanding and even mastering the legal concepts and system.

    In some specific circumstances, learning the concept itself is far from understanding it. For instance, English students learn grammar principles at class, which is quite fundamental and helpful to writing. For fully understanding, they will learn a couple of example sentences, and if they want to make sure of precise handling, they need to make their own sentences. Without doing that, students cannot develop their writing ability and become real English major.

    Learning is a life-long matter in deed, and it is more important for students to learn facts than merely learn concepts and ideas. Only by doing so can we understand the how the ideas and concepts work.


    Would like to know more about how to write a winning Statement of Purpose or Personal Statement? Please visit PersonalStatement101.

    August 26, 2019 at 9:10 pm

    Score: 68.5

    Suggestions for Improvement

    • Shorten/split sentences exceeding 20 words.

    Problems Highlight

    TOEFL Writing Topic: It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

    We have been told [Passive]that a man will never be too late to learn and learning is a life-long matter. But there are some disagreements when it comes to the exact content that people, especially students, should learn. Some people believe that understanding ideas and concepts is more important than learning facts, and the [article error  ] others hold the opposite view. From my own perspective, learning facts is the/an essential process of understanding abstract concepts and great ideas. I mean, without learning facts, students can never fully understand how the concepts and ideas work.
     
    In school, we learn many concepts and ideas from masterpieces of famous human beings, like scientists and artists, but it only completes half part of [ article error ] learning process.[ Wordy ] By knowing the application and cases of those concepts in[ article error ] real situation, students obtain [ article error ] deeper understanding and manage to use it properly. [ Wordy ] When we come upon the stage, at that time nobody teach [ grammatical error ] us concept any more. We only learn facts from our practice, or more often our mistakes. It will be a bit late for us to learn,[punctuation error  ] because many mistakes will be made [Passive] in the process of exercising methods. We will realize by then that we should have learnt those facts when we are students.
     
    Most of [article error  ] knowledge exists for application. Taking law as an example,[ punctuation error ] students cannot understand a legal concept or term properly until putting it into a real case and considering it under our social background.[ Wordy ] Just remembering the words is never enough for a law student. Instead, they need to read cases and use it[incorrect pronoun  ] repeatedly in their career. After practicing a few times, until this[ unclear pronoun ] they can be sure of understanding and even mastering the legal concepts and system.
     
    In some specific circumstances, learning the concept itself is[ Be verb ] far from understanding it. For instance, English [ unclear ] students learn grammar principles at[ wrong preposition ] class, which is quite fundamental and helpful to [incorrect propersition  ] writing. [ Wordy ] For fully understanding, they will learn a couple of example sentences, and if they want to make sure of precise handling, they need to make their own sentences. [ Wordy ] Without doing that, students cannot develop their writing ability and become [ article error ] real English major.
     
    Learning is a life-long matter in deed[ spelling error ] , and it is more important for students to learn facts than merely learn concepts and ideas. Only by doing so can we understand the[ article error ] how the ideas and concepts work.

    Comment: There are more errors than those highlighted ones. Please revise and resubmit your essay for further assessment and revision.  Regards.

    [Please share this essay (copy URL) on your WeChat Moments or relevant social media if you like my revision. Thank you!]

    WritersForMe Writing Tips

    1. Absolute Statement: Avoid using absolute statement.
    2. ARTICLE ERROR: errors concerning a, an, the. This is a prominent issue for Chinese students. Make sure to add/remove/change articles considering a specific context.
    3. BE VERBS: BE verbs are dull and vague. Use concrete verbs to replace BE verbs whenever needed. I.E. commercials are beneficial to children. – Commercials benefit children.
    4. COHERENCE: To improve the natural flow from one sentence to the other, make the subject of a sentence echo the subject, or the object, of the last sentence.
    5. COORDINATING CONJUNCTION error: In formal writing, a comma is needed when the 7 coordinating words (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so – FANBOYS) are connecting sentences/clauses.
    6. Effectiveness: use verbs instead of BE+adjectives to improve effectiveness.
    7. Grammatical Errors: grammatical mistakes.
    8. It + Be + Verb:  Wordy.
    9. Logical confusion. Although a sentence is grammatically correct, often it is logically/factually confusing. Having written a sentence, ask yourself if the sentence is logically complete, and/or factually true.
    10. NOT problem. Experienced writers often avoid using NOT in English writing. I.e. Jack was very upset because he had not passed the GRE test. – I.e. Jack was very upset because he had failed the GRE test.
    11. PASSIVE VOICE: In many cases, clarity suffers when using passive voice. In particular linguistic contexts, using passive voice is fine.
    12. Semicolon: Use a semicolon in front of an adverb/adverbial phrase.
    13. Subjunctive: Memorize the grammatical rules for subjunctive mood.
    14. There Be Sentence: Wordy
    15. Unclear Pronouns: A pronoun (it, this, that, they, them., etc) unclearly refers to the prior content. For example, the first sentence contains two singular nouns, so IT in the second sentence can refer either of them.
    16. Unparalleled Structure:  use paralleled structures, including tense.
    17. VERBOSE: The sentence/phrase can be simplified.
    18. WEAK VERBS: an alternative verb may help improve sentence effectiveness and clarity. The Internet makes us know many things. – The Internet helps us (to) know many things.

    Would like to know how to write Statement of Purpose and Personal Statement? Please visit PersonalStatement101.com.

    wendyliu
    University: TUC
    Nationality: China
    August 27, 2019 at 9:00 am

    TOEFL Writing Topic: It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

    version II:

    We all have known that a man will never be too late to learn and learning is a life-long matter. But there are some disagreements when it comes to the exact content that people, especially students, should learn. Some people believe that understanding ideas and concepts is more important than learning facts, and some others hold the opposite view. From my own perspective, learning facts is an essential process of understanding abstract concepts and great ideas. I mean, without learning facts, students can never fully understand how the concepts and ideas work.

    In school, we learn many concepts and ideas from masterpieces of famous scientists and artists, but it only completes half part of the learning process. Knowing the application cases of those concepts in real situations is the other half. Students’ fully comprehensive learning leads to appropriate application of their knowledge in the society. When we come upon the stage, at that time nobody will teach us concepts any more. We can only learn facts from our practice, or more often our mistakes. It will be a lot more cost because mistakes can be severe sometimes. We will realize by then that we should have done more practice when we are students.

    In some specific circumstances, people failed to understand the concepts without learning the facts. For instance, learning English grammar principles in class plays a quite fundamental role in English writing skill building. For fully understanding, students will study a couple of example sentences under tearcher’s guidence. Then if they want to make sure of precise handling, they need to make their own sentences after class. By correcting their errors and polishing their essays day after day, those students can eventually develop their writing skill and become successful English learners.

    Some ideas and concepts exist for application. without facts, those concepts have no reason to exist. As an example, law students study legal concepts or terms aiming to figure out the disputes in our society. In this case, just remembering the words cannot fullfill the purpose. Instead, they need to put them into real cases and practice properly in their later career. After practicing a few times, until then they can be sure of understanding and even mastering the legal concepts and system.

    Learning is a life-long matter indeed, and it is more important for students to learn facts than to merely understand concepts and ideas. Only by doing so can we understand how the ideas and concepts work.

    September 3, 2019 at 8:43 pm

    Score: 67.5

    You need to shorten your essay to 320-words before I work on it. I will also send you screenshots in relation to the essays’ mistakes and problems.

    Regards,

    Lin Qiu

    wendyliu
    University: TUC
    Nationality: China
    September 4, 2019 at 2:26 pm

    TOEFL Writing Topic: It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

    Version III

    We all have known that a man will never be too late to learn. But there are some disagreements when it comes to the exact content that people, especially students, should learn. Some people believe that understanding ideas and concepts is more important than learning from facts, and others hold the opposite view. From my perspective, learning facts is an essential process of understanding abstract concepts and great ideas.

    As students, we study the concepts and ideas from our textbooks, but it only completes half part of the learning process. Learning how to apply those ideas into real situations is the very other half. When we leave school, at that time, we can only learn facts from practice, or more often, our mistakes. It will be a lot more cost, because even a little error can be severe sometimes. We would realize by then that we should have done more practice when we were students.

    In some specific circumstances, students failed to understand the concepts without learning the facts. For instance, English grammar principles learning plays a quite fundamental role in English writing skill-building. For fully understanding, students will study a couple of example sentences under teacher’s guidance. Then they need to make own sentences after class in order to handle them precisely. By correcting their errors and polishing their essays, students can eventually develop their writing skill and become successful English learners.

    Some concepts exist for application which means that without facts, they may have no reason to exist. Law students study legal concepts or terms aiming to figure out the disputes in society. In this case, they need to put them into real situations and practice daily in their later career. After that they can be sure of understanding and even mastering the legal concepts and system.

    Based on the evidence stated above, it is more important for students to learn facts than to understand the concepts and ideas.