Reply To: Some people argue that the development of technology is making our lives too complex

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. › IELTS Writing › Some people argue that the development of technology is making our lives too complex › Reply To: Some people argue that the development of technology is making our lives too complex

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Administrator
University: University of Wisconsin
October 14, 2020 at 4:07 pm

Score: ungraded

Issues:

  1. About 60% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
  2. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
  3. Article errors
  4. Make your argument clearer in your introduction, why is not living without technology a solution?

I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.