Reply To: It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours Reply To: It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours

Administrator
University: University of Wisconsin
October 21, 2020 at 3:13 pm

Score: ungraded

Issues:

  1. About 50% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
  2. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
  3. Lengthy paragraphs. Restrict each paragraph to 90 words.

I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.