Reply To: Do you agree that movies and television have more negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Do you agree that movies and television have more negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave Reply To: Do you agree that movies and television have more negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave

Administrator
University: University of Wisconsin
November 2, 2020 at 10:46 pm

Score: ungraded

Issues:

  1. About 65% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
  2. About 25% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
  3. Lengthy paragraphs. Restrict each paragraph to 90 words.

I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.