Reply To: Governments should not spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Governments should not spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Reply To: Governments should not spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams.

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University: University of Wisconsin
November 25, 2020 at 11:10 am

Partial revision (refer to previous suggestions) – essay needs significant revision

When it comes to whether to provide more financial support to art than to athletics, there always are s Some people argue arguing that governments should offer more support to art, while others want to fund athletics instead disapprove. From my perspective, I prefer that the former proposal is wrong. There need more sophisticated thoughts about this issue. (Rewrite these sentences, clearly state which side you support and why)

Aiding more on Funding athletics brings considerable visible profits to the country. For example, In the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games held in Beijing in 2008, the most splendid and lavish game ever, put China on the map in the athletic world and showed the power of Chinese society athletics all over the world competed together to surpass best records. If someone won get a gold medal, there is no doubt that he is honorable. Further, the country that wins ners represented will be respected by receive respects from other countries. The delight of winning can pull economic flourish, through such wins, all countries will benefit from it. In this term, how could people endorse more aids to art? (Rewrite)

On the contrast, supporting more on arts does no use to development of a country. If the governments support more on art than athletics, it means the governments have not paid enough attention to athletics. With the fact that countries don’t get any visible gains, their progress is slow. Thus, the governments should focus more on practical fields such as economic, sports games, standard of living, and so on. Nowadays, the mainstream value deems that a country isn’t considered a powerful country without enough gold medals. In other words, a nation can improve its international status by supporting more on athletics.

Though art does inspire humans a lot in fabric of society. It does not come to conclusion that this field is more vital to humans than athletics. Sports games always pursue higher, faster and stronger. And humans indeed benefit from this positive goal and foster healthier lifestyle.

So, the points I just described express which opinion I lean. Though art seems to be vital to humans, it is more practical to think from the country’s angle. For more benefits a country can get, we should aid more on athletics.