Reply To: The bar chart below shows the ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing The bar chart below shows the ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Reply To: The bar chart below shows the ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

March 9, 2021 at 4:24 pm

Score: ungraded

Issues:

  1. About 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them. (TOEFL/IELTS: 15%- qualifies for non-software revision; 30% applies to GRE writing)
  2. About 15% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. (10%- qualifies for non-software TOEFL/IELTS/GRE writing revision );
  3. Most sentences lack transition from the prior sentence.

I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.