A recent sales study indicates that consumption of seafood dishes in Bay City restaurants has increased by 30 percent during the past five years. Yet there are no currently operating city restaurants whose specialty is seafood. Moreover, the majority of families in Bay City are two-income families,

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. GRE Writing A recent sales study indicates that consumption of seafood dishes in Bay City restaurants has increased by 30 percent during the past five years. Yet there are no currently operating city restaurants whose specialty is seafood. Moreover, the majority of families in Bay City are two-income families,

  • miuGrey
    University: Macau University of Science and Technology
    Nationality: China
    September 9, 2021 at 1:11 pm

    A recent sales study indicates that consumption of seafood dishes in Bay City restaurants has increased by 30 percent during the past five years. Yet there are no currently operating city restaurants whose specialty is seafood. Moreover, the majority of families in Bay City are two-income families, and a nationwide study has shown that such families eat significantly fewer home-cooked meals than they did a decade ago but at the same time express more concern about healthful eating. Therefore, the new Captain Seafood restaurant that specializes in seafood should be quite popular and profitable.

    In this argument, the author predicts that the Captain Restaurant which specializes in seafood might be popular in Bay City. To justify this conclusion, the author points out that consumption of seafood in Bay City increased 30% in the past 5 years, but there is no seafood restaurant now. The author also mentions that people nationwide are more likely to eat out according to a study, which strengthens the conclusion above. The information listed shows it is a great opportunity to open a seafood restaurant in this city. However, without proving that people in Bay City really need or want a seafood restaurant, this argument fails to be persuasive as it stands.

    Firstly, the author simply assumes that the Captain Restaurant will be popular in Bay City because of the increasing seafood consumption here. In some aspects, rising consumption might reflect the popularity of goods, but the situation is not unique. It cannot prove that residents of Bay City prefer seafood, so the seafood restaurant may not be popular here. The increase in people’s income or the cheaper price of seafood might also strengthen the consumption of seafood. If the author can provide evidence that people in Bay City definitely like seafood through some surveys, the argument will be significantly strengthened.

    Additionally, it is improper to predict that the lack of seafood restaurants in Bay City will help Captain Seafood Restaurant to be popular and profitable. Going to seafood restaurants is not the only way to enjoy seafood in Bay City. For example, if other restaurants could provide enough seafood that meets people’s needs at a proper price, or the citizens here prefer to cook seafood by themselves, there is no reason to have seafood in specific seafood restaurants. In a word, we cannot make sure that the Captain Seafood restaurant will be popular and profitable.

    Finally, we still need to prove the evidence that residents of Bay City eat significantly fewer home-cooked meals than a decade ago, as the nationwide study shows. But it is inappropriate to conclude the local phenomenon by a universality conclusion. The situation in Bay City might be quite different from nationwide. The author needs to prove that with a new survey in Bay City to strengthen this conclusion.

    In short, we cannot be persuaded by the evidence above. The author should provide more evidence to make sure the decision is reliable, then avoid unnecessary losses.

    September 10, 2021 at 3:17 pm

    Fix all issues indicated on my screenshot reviews.

    miuGrey
    University: Macau University of Science and Technology
    Nationality: China
    September 11, 2021 at 6:58 am

    In this argument, the author predicts that the new Captain Seafood Restaurant might be popular in Bay City. To justify this conclusion, the author points out that consumption of seafood dishes in Bay City restaurants increased 30% in the past 5 years, but there is no specialty seafood restaurant now. More, a nationwide study shows that people in this country are more likely to eat out. That strengthens author’s conclusion. The information listed shows it is a great opportunity to open a seafood restaurant in this city. However, without proving that people in Bay City really need or want a seafood restaurant, this argument fails to be persuasive as it stands.

    Firstly, the author assumes that the Captain Restaurant will be popular in Bay City because of the increasing seafood dished consumption. In some aspects, rising consumption might reflect the popularity of goods, but the situation is not unique. It cannot prove that residents of Bay City prefer seafood dishes, so the seafood restaurant may not be popular here. The increase in people’s income or the lower price of seafood dishes might also strengthen the consumption of seafood dishes. If the evidence that people in Bay City are definitely enjoy seafood dishes can be provided, this conclusion will be significantly strengthened.

    Additionally, it is improper to predict that the lack of seafood restaurants in Bay City will help Captain Seafood Restaurant to be popular and profitable. Going to seafood restaurants is not the only way to enjoy seafood in Bay City. For example, if other restaurants could provide enough seafood that meets people’s needs at a proper price, or the citizens here prefer to cook seafood by themselves, there is no reason to have seafood in specific seafood restaurants. In a word, we cannot make sure that the Captain Seafood restaurant will be popular and profitable.

    Finally, we still need to prove the evidence that residents of Bay City eat significantly fewer home-cooked meals than a decade ago, as the nationwide study shows. But it is inappropriate to conclude the local phenomenon by a universality conclusion. The situation in Bay City might be quite different from nationwide. The author needs to prove that with a new survey in Bay City to strengthen this conclusion.

    In short, we cannot be persuaded by the evidence above. The author should provide more evidence to make sure the decision is reliable, then avoid unnecessary losses.

    September 13, 2021 at 7:44 pm

    In this argument, the author predicts that the new Captain Seafood Restaurant might be popular in Bay City. To justify this conclusion, the author points out that consumption of seafood dishes in Bay City restaurants increased [ by ] 30% in the past 5 years, but there is no specialty seafood restaurant now. More[Moreover  ], a nationwide study shows that people in this country are more likely to eat out. That[ , which ] strengthens [ the ]author’s conclusion. The information listed shows it is a great opportunity to open a seafood restaurant in this city. However, without proving that people in Bay City really need or want a seafood restaurant, this argument fails to be persuasive as it stands.

    Firstly, the author assumes that the Captain Restaurant will be popular in Bay City because of the increasing (seafood dished)[ ? ] consumption. In some aspects, rising consumption might reflect the popularity of goods, but the situation is not unique[ unclear sentence ]. It cannot prove that residents of Bay City prefer seafood dishes, so the seafood restaurant may not be popular here. The increase in people’s income or the lower price of seafood dishes might also strengthen [lead to  ]the consumption of seafood dishes. If the evidence that people in Bay City are definitely enjoy seafood dishes can be provided[  grammatical error/subjunctive], this conclusion will [ grammatical error ]be significantly strengthened.

    Additionally, it is improper to predict that the lack of seafood restaurants in Bay City will help Captain Seafood Restaurant to be[become  ] popular and profitable. Going to seafood restaurants is not the only way to enjoy seafood in Bay City. For example, if other restaurants could provide enough seafood that meets people’s needs at a proper price, or the citizens here prefer to cook seafood by themselves, there is[ grammatical error ] no reason to have seafood in specific seafood restaurants.[wordy sentence  ] In a word, we cannot make sure[ ascertain ] that the Captain Seafood restaurant will be popular and profitable.

    Finally, we still need to prove the evidence [ to prove ] that residents of Bay City eat significantly fewer home-cooked meals than[they did  ] a decade ago, as the nationwide study shows. But it is inappropriate to conclude the local phenomenon by a universality[word choice  ] conclusion[ unclear sentence ]. The situation in Bay City might be quite different from [those in other parts of the nation  ] nationwide. The author needs to prove that with a new survey in Bay City to strengthen this conclusion[ grammatical error ].

    In short, we cannot be persuaded by[ use active sentence ] the evidence above. The author should provide more evidence to make sure the decision is reliable, then avoid unnecessary losses[ unclear ].

    September 13, 2021 at 8:02 pm

    Final revision.