After making a presentation in class, you want to evaluate it. Which of the following do you think would be better for you? 1.watching the recording by yourself 2.inviting other attenders to discuss and give opinions.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing After making a presentation in class, you want to evaluate it. Which of the following do you think would be better for you? 1.watching the recording by yourself 2.inviting other attenders to discuss and give opinions.

  • youqi
    University: southwest jiaotong university
    Nationality: china
    May 3, 2020 at 4:17 am

    After making a presentation in class, you want to evaluate it. Which of the following do you think would be better for you? 1.watching the recording by yourself 2.inviting other attenders to discuss and give opinions.

    Making a presentation is a common task during our study life. After taking the formal presentation in class for classmates and professors, students prefer to evaluate it in some ways to find and improve the problems. I think watching the recording by themselves is a better way for the following reasons.

    First, watching by oneself would save a lot of time. People who have held parties know that it’s really difficult to find a time when everyone is leisure and gather all attenders. In the process of making sure the time, people have to communicate with participators as long as there is one participant’s time unsuitable. Inviting other attenders to discuss for the presentation is the same as holding a party. It is not easy for everyone is free at the same time. Therefore, students would take a lot of time coordinating. However, students could use this time to improve their presentation to be more sufficient rather than connect with attenders.

    Second, there would be fewer restrictions if people evaluate the presentation by watching the recording by themselves. We already know gather participants is difficult and time-consuming, so people maybe only have one time or several times to invite others to discuss the presentation. But if people evaluate by themselves, they can watch their presentation video anytime and constantly try again when they aren’t satisfied with their presentation without any limitation.

    Finally, some people think attending other attenders can get more valuable suggestions. But it might be the opposite of the actual situation. Sometimes attenders generally wouldn’t propose their true mind with their consideration of reporter’s mood. I have used to be the attender to evaluate my friend’s presentation. But I worried I might hurt him and didn’t point out the questions involved in his presentation. In this case, the discussion does not make sense because people can’t get effective feedback.

    In conclusion, although inviting others to evaluate presentations seems to have many advantages, it couldn’t be achieved in the actual situation. So, recording the presentation and watching it by oneself is a better way.

    May 4, 2020 at 1:05 am

    Score: 55.7

    Issues:

    1. About 30% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. Many article errors. You need to find online materials (prepared by native writers) to learn how to use THE. I.e. “After taking the formal presentation in class”. In this context, giving a presentation was not mentioned before, so it is wrong to use THE.
    3. Many words are used incorrectly. I.E. Taking a presentation – delivering/giving a presentation; Improve A Problem. How could you improve a problem?

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    youqi
    University: southwest jiaotong university
    Nationality: china
    May 4, 2020 at 3:32 am

    Making a presentation is an inevitable task during our study life. After delivering a formal presentation in class to classmates and professors, students prefer to evaluate it in some ways to improve by finding drawbacks. I believe watching recordings by themselves is a better approach for the following reasons.

    First, watching by oneself would save a lot of time. People who have organized discussions should be familiar with the challenge of managing schedules collectively. In the process of preparing for the discussion, people need to do many tasks such as contacting many people to ensure the participants can join it, asking for a time when participants are free, and determining a place where the discussion will be held. These would take a lot of time. By contrast, utilizing time to focus on reflecting the work individually is a much time-efficient approach to make progress in the presentation.

    Second, there would be fewer restrictions if people reflect their work by themselves because students can watch their records at any time and playback easily when they need additional focus. The process of preparing a discussion is complex and time-consuming, so students don’t have many chances to invite people to give opinions for their presentation. Thus, the opportunities so rare that can’t help us sufficiently.

    Admittedly, some people insist attending other attenders can obtain more valuable suggestions. But it might be the opposite of the actual situation. Sometimes attenders generally wouldn’t propose their authentic opinion due to their consideration of the reporter’s mood. For example, I used to be a participant in watching my friend’s presentation. But I worried I would hurt him and didn’t point out the shortcomings involved in his presentation. In this case, the discussion is meaningless because people can’t get effective feedback.

    In conclusion, although inviting others to discuss presentations seems to have many advantages, it will be different in the actual situation. So, recording the presentation and watching it by oneself is a better way.

    May 5, 2020 at 2:42 am

    Score: ungraded

    You have NOT fixed the errors indicated in my previous feedback.

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