All university students should be required to take history courses no matter what their field of study is. 

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing All university students should be required to take history courses no matter what their field of study is. 

  • Catherineliu0811
    University: Shanghai University
    Nationality: United States
    June 18, 2021 at 11:08 pm

    All university students should be required to take history courses no matter what their field of study is. 

    With our universities providing us various classes to meet requirements for different majors, how to judge which courses should be mandatory and which should be elective is one of major topics in education industry. The history courses are also difficult to be decided. Personally, I would prefer to classify history courses as elective courses.

    To begin with, human history is important for our culture and sometimes even more so than other knowledge, but spend a lot of time and effort to learn it is unnecessary. It is true that we have a lot of resources to know about history such as we can go to the history museums, take part in different meetings and surf online to explore some specific history for our personal interests instead of registering it as our mandatory courses in university. While this is the case, if we will not take the history as our future career, we can enjoy the process of history learning as one of our amusement activities. This will help to arise our passion for history learning. For example, I was not interested in history before but after I traveled back from Xi’an – one of historical sites in my country- I was fascinate with Tang Dynasty and did a lot or research for this dynasty by myself. Instead of being forced to learn, this travel made me understand the charming of history.

    Besides that, including history classes as mandatory course will squeeze our major learning time and generate more pressure on students. We can spend more time on majors that will help our future career development. According to the model built by “Economist”, one more mandatory course added in student syllabus, 1 hour sleeping time would be decreased from students. It would definitely cause students mental health.

    All in all, knowing about history is important for human civilization but we don’t need to make it as mandatory courses. We can figure out some other methods to make history learning to be interesting and arise students’ passion for it.

    June 23, 2021 at 4:31 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 50% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them. (TOEFL/IELTS: 15%- qualifies for non-software revision; 30% applies to GRE writing)
    2. About 20% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. (10%- qualifies for non-software TOEFL/IELTS/GRE writing revision );
    3. Lengthy paragraphs; restrict each paragraph to 90 words. 

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    Catherineliu0811
    University: Shanghai University
    Nationality: United States
    July 18, 2021 at 1:32 am

    Our universities provide us various classes nowadays. We need to judge which courses are mandatory and which are not. The history courses are also one of controversial courses. I would prefer to classify history courses to be elective.

    Firstly, it may waste students time and distract their attention from their majors. These students will not engage in jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, reciting historical events and understanding the impacts for different dynasties are unnecessary. They can spend time on what they are really interested in and get a better achievement in the future. For example, politics is also a mandatory course when I was young. I spent a lot of time to recite revolution events to pass the exam. My current major is Computer Science. If I spend more time on my own field instead of reciting political events, I may get a better job.

    Secondly, students may already exhaust with exams for their own majors. Adding history courses as their mandatory courses may burn them out. Furthermore, it may cause students feel pressure and let them hate to study. According to the model built by “Economist”, one more mandatory course added in student syllabus, 1 hour sleeping time would be decreased from students. It would cause students depressed.

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a well-knowledge person. I agree but we can have different sources to get history knowledge instead of having it as mandatory courses. For example, we can surf online to explore some specific history for our personal interests, or we can go to the museum to enjoy the real antique objects and read stories behind them. These methods will make us understand the charming of the history better.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization.  However, we don’t need to make them as mandatory courses. We can figure out some other methods to make history learning interesting.

    July 19, 2021 at 10:01 am

    Our (delete, unnecessary) universities provide (offer) us (delete, unnecessary) various (a wide variety of) classes nowadays. We need to judge which courses are mandatory and which are not. The (delete, unnecessary) history courses are also (delete, unnecessary) one of the controversial courses. I would prefer to classify history courses to be (as an) elective (combine the two previous sentences into one).

    Firstly, it may waste students (missing possessive apostrophe) time and distract their attention away from their majors. These (Most) students will not engage (word choice error) in jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, reciting (word choice error) historical events and understanding the impacts for (impact of) different dynasties are (is) unnecessary. They can (should) spend time on what they are really interested in and get a better achievement in the future (simplify). For example, politics is (was) also a mandatory course when I was young (rephrase). I spent a lot of time to recite (verb form error) revolution events to pass the exam. My current major is Computer Science. If I spend more time on my own field instead of reciting political events, I may get a better job (combine the two previous sentences into one).

    Secondly, students may already exhaust themselves with exams for their own majors. Adding history courses as their (delete, unnecessary) mandatory courses may burn them out (combine the two previous sentences into one). Furthermore, it may cause students to feel pressure and let (make) them hate to study (verb form error). According to the (a) model built by “Economist”, one more mandatory course added in student syllabus, 1 hour sleeping time would be decreased from students (rewrite for clarity). It would cause students depressed (delete, unnecessary).

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a well-knowledge (word choice error) person. I agree (add comma) but we can have different sources to get history knowledge instead of having it as mandatory courses (a mandatory course). For example, we can surf online to explore some specific history for our personal interests, or we can go to the museum to enjoy the (delete, unnecessary) real antique objects and read stories behind them. These methods will make us understand the charming (charm) of the (delete, unnecessary) history better.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization.  However, we don’t need to make them as mandatory courses (it a mandatory course). We can figure out some other methods to make history learning interesting. (combine two previous sentences into one)

    July 19, 2021 at 12:38 pm

    Final revision.

    Catherineliu0811
    University: Shanghai University
    Nationality: United States
    July 22, 2021 at 2:05 am

    Universities offer a wide variety of classes nowadays. We need to judge which courses are mandatory and which are not. History courses are one of the controversial courses and I would prefer to classify history as an elective course.

    Firstly, it may waste students’ time and distract their attention away from their majors. Most students will not do jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, researching historical events and understanding the impact of different dynasties is unnecessary. They should spend time on what they are really interested in. For example, politics was a mandatory course in my university. I spent a lot of time reciting revolution events to pass the exam. However, my current major is Computer Science and I would get a better job if I spent more time on my major instead of studying unrelated courses.

    Secondly, students may already exhaust themselves with exams for their own majors and adding history courses as mandatory courses may burn them out. Furthermore, it may cause students to feel pressure and make them hate studying. According to a research issued by “Economist”, students only have 5 hours in sleeping daily in their final weeks. If we add history courses as additional mandatory courses, it will cause students to lack sleeping hours even more and have healthy issues.

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a knowledgeable person. I agree, but we can have different sources to get history knowledge instead of having it as a mandatory course. For example, we can surf online to explore some specific history for our personal interests, or we can go to the museum to enjoy real antique objects and read stories behind them. These methods will make us understand the charm of history better.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization.  However, we can figure out some other methods to make history learning interesting instead of classifying it as a mandatory course.

     

    July 27, 2021 at 4:56 pm

    Universities offer a wide variety of classes nowadays. [lack of transition   ] We need to judge which courses are mandatory and which are not. History courses are one of the controversial courses [ punctuation error  ] and (I would prefer to classify history as an elective course)[ unclear  ] .

    Firstly, it[unclear pronoun   ] may waste students’ time and distract their attention away from their majors. Most students will not do jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, researching historical events and understanding the impact of different dynasties is unnecessary. They should spend time on what they are really interested in. For example, politics[ Politics  ]  was a mandatory course in my university. [ , so  ] I spent a lot of time reciting (revolution events)[ unclear  ] [ in order  ] to pass the exam. However, my current major is Computer Science and I would get a better job if I spent more time on my major instead of studying unrelated courses.

    Secondly, students may already exhaust themselves with exams for their own majors and [. As such,  ] adding history courses as mandatory courses[repetition   ] may (burn them out)[ unclear  ] . Furthermore, it[unclear pronoun   ] may cause students to feel pressure and make them hate studying. According to a[ article error  ] research issued[  /punlished ] by “[ The  ] Economist”, students[  specify where ] only have 5 hours in sleeping daily in their final weeks. If we add [ grammatical error  ] history courses as additional mandatory courses[ones   ] , it will cause[further deprive   ] students to lack [of their   ] sleeping hours even more and have healthy[ health  ] issues.

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a knowledgeable person. I agree, but we can have different sources to get[ /acquire/develop  ] history knowledge instead of having it as a mandatory course. For example, we can surf online to explore (some specific history)[ grammatical error  ] for our personal interests, or we can go to the museum to enjoy real antique objects and read stories behind them. These methods will[ zero-conditional  ] make us understand the charm of history better.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization.  However, we can figure out some other methods to make history learning interesting (instead of classifying it as a mandatory course)[ repetition  ] .

    July 27, 2021 at 5:07 pm

    Final revision.

    Catherineliu0811
    University: Shanghai University
    Nationality: United States
    July 30, 2021 at 4:55 am

    Universities offer a wide variety of classes nowadays. From these courses, we need to judge which courses are mandatory and which are not. History course is one of the controversial courses. Personally, universities shouldn’t require all students attend it.

    Firstly, requiring all students attend history course may waste students’ time and distract their attention from their majors. Most students won’t go in for jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, they should spend more time on what they really interested and can be benefit from instead of spending a lot of time on unrelated courses. For example, Politics was a mandatory course in my university, so I spent plenty of time on studying the social policies in order to pass the exam. However, my current major is Computer Science and I would get a better job if I spent more time on my major instead of studying unrelated courses.

    Secondly, students may already exhaust themselves with exams for their own majors. As such, adding history courses will expose them to great pressure. Furthermore, students may hate history. According to the research published by “ The Economist”, students in the universities only have 5 sleeping hours during the final week. If we added history courses as additional mandatory ones, it would further deprive students of their sleeping hours.

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a knowledgeable person. I agree, but we can have different sources to acquire history knowledge instead of having it as a mandatory course. For example, we can surf online, go to the museum or travel to historical sites. If we explored historical knowledge by these relaxing methods, we would be happy to acquire historical knowledge.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization. However, we can figure out some other methods to make history learning more interesting.

    July 30, 2021 at 3:19 pm

    Universities offer a wide variety of classes nowadays. From[Among   ] these courses, we need to judge which courses are mandatory and which are not. History course is one of the controversial courses. Personally[In my opinion   ], universities shouldn’t require all students[to   ] attend it.

    Firstly, requiring all students[ to  ] attend [  the History ]history course may waste students’ time and distract their attention from their majors. Most students won’t go in for jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, they should spend more time on what they [ are  ]really interested [ in, which  ]and can be benefit [them more.   ] from instead of spending a lot of time on unrelated courses. For example, Politics was a mandatory course in my university, so I spent plenty of time on studying the social policies in order to pass the exam. However, my current major is Computer Science[, so   ] and I would get a better job if I spent more time on my major instead of studying unrelated courses[/coursework   ].

    Secondly, students may already exhaust themselves with exams for their own majors. As such, adding history[history-related   ] courses will expose them to great pressure. Furthermore, students may hate history[ the History course  ]. According to the research published by “ The Economist”, students in the[  Chinese ] universities only have 5 sleeping hours during the final week. If we added history courses as additional mandatory ones, it would further deprive students of their sleeping hours.

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a knowledgeable person. I agree, but we can have different sources to acquire history knowledge instead of having it as a mandatory course. For example, we can surf online, go to the museum or travel to historical sites. If we explored historical knowledge by these relaxing methods, we would be happy to acquire historical knowledge.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization. However, we can figure out some other methods to make history learning more interesting.

    Catherineliu0811
    University: Shanghai University
    Nationality: United States
    August 1, 2021 at 6:31 am

    I ‘m afraid I have to disagree with the statement. In my opinion, mandatory courses should be decided by students’ majors. Requiring all students to take the History as mandatory course may waste their time and even let them hate the history.

     

    Firstly, requiring all students to attend the History course may distract their attention from their majors. Students’ performance in their major studying will influence the jobs they can get in the future. Most students won’t go in for jobs related to history in their future career. Thus, they should spend more time on what they are really interested in, which can benefit them more. For example, Politics was a mandatory course in my university, so I spent plenty of time  studying social politics in order to pass exam. However, my current major is Computer Science, so I would get a better job if I spent more time on my major instead of unrelated coursework.

     

    Secondly, students may already exhaust themselves with exams for their own majors. As such, adding history-related courses will expose them to great pressure. The pressure may cause students hate the History course and lead to healthy issues. According to the research published by “ The Economist”, students in Chinese universities only have 5 sleeping hours during the final week. If we added history courses as additional mandatory ones, it would further deprive students of their sleeping hours. Lacking sleeping hours will influence students’ academic performance and expose students to more pressure.

     

     

    Thirdly, some people may argue that understanding human history is important to cultivate a knowledgeable person. I agree, but we can have different sources to acquire history knowledge instead of having it as a mandatory course. For example, we can surf online, go to the museum or travel to historical sites. If we explored historical knowledge by these relaxing methods, we would be happy to acquire historical knowledge.

    All in all, history is critical for human civilization. However, we can figure out some other methods to make history learning more interesting in order to avoid negative effects.

     

    August 1, 2021 at 2:57 pm

    I will not work on essays subsequent to the indication of ‘final revision.’