At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
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April 22, 2021 at 3:23 am
At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
With the quick social advancement, people attach great importance on university education. Some people claim that it is essential for university to put more money on classes and libraries because academic facilities is foundation of the education . while i believe that sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
To begin with, sports could strengthen students’ body. With the ampler financial support in sports, the facilities such as running machine,swimming pool and dancing room in the gym could be set up, which enable students to exercise themselves on campus. What’s more, participating in some sport competitions like badminton, tennis and basketball game would help students to learn more about cooperation in team work and build their willpower.To be more specific, all the members need to work together to reach a common goal and stick to it. For example, the offensive part of the basketball game provides great opportunities to teach students to be unselfish and stick on it as they work together to score and win. consequently, there is every reason to believe that financial support on sport is as equal important as that of classes and libraries.
Moreover, participating in social activities constitutes a stepping stone to one’s future career. Only after fully involved in social activities in person can students truly understand the constitutions and operation of the society. To be more specific, it enables them to get along with their colleagues so as to well prepared for their workplace. For example , students can do some field works such as interviewing people,gathering materials about social issues and working at company as an intern, all this practice their communicating and thinking abilities which is initial to one’s career .
From what has been discussed above, i draw a conclusion that it is more advisable that sports and social activities are just as important as classes because of contributing to their health and personal development.
April 23, 2021 at 2:26 amScore: ungraded
Issues:
- About 65% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them. (TOEFL/IELTS: 15%- qualifies for non-software revision; 30% applies to GRE writing)
- About 20% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. (10%- qualifies for non-software TOEFL/IELTS/GRE writing revision ).
I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.
April 23, 2021 at 2:06 pmWith the [ article error ]quick[ /rapid ] social advancement, people attach great importance on[ preposition error ] university education.
Some[Therefore, some ]people claim that it is essential for university[word form error ] to put more money on classes and libraries because academic facilities is[grammatical error ] [ the ]foundation of[preposition error ] the[articl error ] education. [As such, ]whilei [spelling error ]believe that sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support[grammatical error ].To begin with, sports could strengthen students’ body. With the[article error ] ampler[word form issue ] financial support in [ preposition error ]sports, the[article error ] facilities such as running machine[ word form error ], swimming pool and dancing room[ word form error ] in the gym could be set up, which enable[grammatical error ] students to exercise
themselveson campus.What’s more, participating in
somesport competitionslike[such as ] badminton, tennis and basketball game[word form error ] would help students to learn more aboutcooperation inteam work and build[ /strengthen ] their willpower. To be more specific, all the members[unclear ] need to work together toreach[ accomplish ] a common goal and stick to it. For example, the offensive part of the basketball game provides great opportunities to teach students to be unselfish and stick on it as they work together to score and win. consequently, there is every reason to believe that financial support on sport is as equal important as that of classes and libraries.Moreover, participating in social activities constitutes a stepping stone to one’s future career. Only after fully involved in social activities in person can students truly understand the constitutions and operation of the society. To be more specific, it enables them to get along with their colleagues so as to well prepared for their workplace. For example , students can do some field works such as interviewing people,gathering materials about social issues and working at company as an intern, all this practice their communicating and thinking abilities which is initial to one’s career .
From what has been discussed above, i draw a conclusion that it is more advisable that sports and social activities are just as important as classes because of contributing to their health and personal development.
April 24, 2021 at 1:04 pmWith rapid social advancement, people attach great importance to university education. Therefore, Some people claim that it is essential for universities to put more money on classes and libraries because academic facilities are critical to education. As such, I believe that sports and social activities are as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial supports.
To begin with, sports could strengthen students’ body. With ample financial support for sports, facilities such as running machines,swimming pool and dancing rooms in the gym could enable students to exercise. What’s more, participating in sport competitions would help students to learn more about team work and strengthen their willpower.To be more specific, all the members need to cooperate to accomplish a common goal. For example, the offensive part of the basketball game provides great opportunities to teach students to be unselfish and stick on it. Therefore, financial support on sport is as equally important as that of classes and libraries.
Moreover, participating in social activities constitutes a stepping stone to one’s future career. Only after fully involved in social activities in person can students truly understand society. To be more specific, it enables them to fully prepare for their career and find a job with a decent pay .For example, students can do some field works such as interviewing people, gathering information about social issues and working at company as an intern. During the process, their employable skills such as communicating and thinking abilities get exercised .
From what has been discussed above, I draw a conclusion that sports and social activities should receive same financial supports, because both of them contribute to students’ health and personal career.
April 24, 2021 at 2:26 pmScore: 44
Issues:
- About 50% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them. (TOEFL/IELTS: 15%- qualifies for non-software revision; 30% applies to GRE writing)
- About 15% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. (10%- qualifies for non-software TOEFL/IELTS/GRE writing revision ).
I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.
