Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  • 1015219599
    University: BeiJing University of Chemical Technology
    Nationality: Chinese
    May 22, 2020 at 12:32 pm

    Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

    I disagree.In my opinion,government should spend more money to support athletics.It’s well-known in China that a strong body can help you keep working in health. Government can provide enough gym and republication to supports athletics.Then people will get more chances to exercise and keep healthy.For personal life,regular exercise life not only means a healthy status,but also a good habit.Many researchers point out that people who usually take exercise can work better and be happier than others.For a country,we need to care about people’s health.

    Athletics also include professional sports,such as soccer,basketball and pingpong.Government also should support professional sports’ development such as CBA and Chinese football super league.These professional sports clubs can make a huge profit and make many new jobs for  people.Now,Chinese professional sports are still in a low level and we used to miss a lot of chances to make it better.Let me see some Erupean countries.For example,in Span,there are lots of professional footbal clubs and Laliga is the most popular match in the world.Every year,football games can make over 10billion dollars!And they also make some great success.Span won the world champion in 2010 and Erupean champion in 2008 and 2012.You know,world cup and Olypic games are the best chance to show a country’s power in sports,culture and economy.If you support arts,it may can’t work because most people don’t enjoy these arts but they love sports game.People need entertainment instead of arts and sports match can provide it.

    Government supports athletics is better,it can make money,strong people’s body and show country’s power and more.If government supports arts,they may get nothing and people can’t enjoy the achivement.

    • This topic was modified 6 days, 21 hours ago by Lin QiuLin Qiu.
    • This topic was modified 6 days, 21 hours ago by Lin QiuLin Qiu.
    • This topic was modified 6 days, 21 hours ago by Lin QiuLin Qiu.
    May 24, 2020 at 4:23 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 100% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. Lengthy paragraphs. Restrict each paragraph to 80 words.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    May 24, 2020 at 4:24 pm

    Invalid [ WeChat unavailable]