Graph with British students and employment status

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Graph with British students and employment status

  • shu
    University: inner Mongolia medical university
    Nationality: China
    August 18, 2021 at 3:23 pm

     

    The graph describes the not full-time work that British students who have gained bachelor degree and master degree did after graduating from college in 2008.

    Largely, there were more graduate students than postgraduate ones in each of jobs that were not full-time work in 2008. Additionally, the number of students in further study was the largest in all work among two types of people.

    Among these students, we might see a trend that keeping on further study was the main choose, which had the most figure of people. And the number of graduate students in further study was the ten times in postgraduate. Noticeable, there was the same percentage in unemployment as graduate students as postgraduate students.

    The significant disparity was in the area of part-time work, where the graduate students was just the half of those in further study, comparing with postgraduate students was only less than 200 in further study, There was no doubt that the figure of working in voluntary was the lowest in different education background students, which the number of postgraduate students was just one to tenth it in graduate students.

    August 27, 2021 at 12:12 pm

    The graph describes the not full-time work (word choice error) that British students who have gained bachelor degree and master degree (plural) did after graduating from college in 2008.

    Largely, there were more graduate students than postgraduate ones (delete) in each of jobs that were not full-time work in 2008 (part-time job). Additionally, the number of students in further study was the largest in all work among two types of people.

    Among these students, we might see a trend that keeping on further study was the main choose, which had the most figure of people. And the number of graduate students in further study was the ten times in postgraduate. Noticeable, there was the same percentage in unemployment as graduate students as postgraduate students.

    The significant disparity was in the area of part-time work, where the graduate students was just the half of those in further study, comparing with postgraduate students was only less than 200 in further study, There was no doubt that the figure of working in voluntary was the lowest in different education background students, which the number of postgraduate students was just one to tenth it in graduate students.

    August 27, 2021 at 3:30 pm

    Partial revision (significant issues with clarity, remove unnecessary words and make similar improvements as those provided above)

    August 27, 2021 at 3:32 pm

    Revision under suspension [ Messaged not responded on WeChat]