In a laboratory study of liquid antibacterial hand soaps, a concentrated solution of UltraClean produced a 40 percent greater reduction in the bacteria population than did.

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  • jimmy lai
    University: Whuhan university
    Nationality: China
    January 18, 2021 at 3:06 am

    In a laboratory study of liquid antibacterial hand soaps, a concentrated solution of UltraClean produced a 40 percent greater reduction in the bacteria population than did.

    This memo advocates that in an attempt to prevent serious infection, UltraClean  should be applied to all their hospitals. To support this recommendation, the author points out that the test at hospital located in Workby shows significant effection of UltraClean. Although the memo is seemingly no problem, relying on a series of unanswered questions, the author’s disscusions to the conclusion are not serious sufficiently. Only grasp answers of these questions can we get a more complete understanding of the strengths and weaknesses of this memo.

    To begin with, the first question we can ask is that does UltraClean rather than other factors lead to a decline infection of patients in hospital at Workby? It is conceivable that the author fails to take other potential reasons resulting in the phenomenon into consideration. In reality, the decline infection of patients may simply result from a decline of patients entering in that hospital. Some patients perhaps turn to other hospitals due to that hospital’s decrasing quality and increasing treatment fees. Additionally, improving cleanning condition in hospital also contributes to the infectin decline.

    We can further ask are the hospital at Workby and hospitals in other regions comparable at every aspect? Assume that UltraClean is applied to all the company’s hospitals, the outcomes might be greatly different. As a matter of fact, there is a myriad of difference among hospitals in different areas. Maybe people in Workby possess higher cleanning consciousness and doctors and nurses in Workby are highly resposible for their patients, frequently asking them to wash their hands by UltraClean. regional climate is problably another factor. Perhaps the climate in Workby is hot, being negative to bacteria’s surval while in some other regions, the temperature is so low that bacteria is able to generate easily. In short, without comparing with other hospitals meticulously, the author’s statements are unsubstantiated.

    Finally, we ask are there nagetive effects of supplying the new hand soap at each hosptial? Even assuming UltraClean do decrease the patient infection efficiently, the suggestion might not be the ideal one. The author neglects potential negative effects of the advise. The price of UltraClean maybe high, leading to an mounting expense  of the company. Besides, patients’ attitudes towards the new hand soap are neglected by the author. Perhaps some people don’t like it due to its strange odor.  Futhermore, the author ignore the potential negative effects of the new hand soap. Actually, the author should consider other potential solutions, such as looking for other hand soaps and improving the cleanning condition of hospitals, and compare them with the present one.

    In conclusion, for the purpose of evaluating the recommendation of  the memo reasonably, there are lots of questions needed to be answered. The author must consider other factors responsible for infection decrease and identify the difference results of appling UltraClean in diffrence hospitals. Moreover, the author needs to search for other potential solutions and determines which is the best.

     

     

     

     

    January 19, 2021 at 1:45 am

    Score: 47.7

    Issues:

    1. About 35% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them.
    2. About 15% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. 

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.