In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

  • Tara
    University: Zhejiang Formal Uni
    Nationality: China
    October 13, 2020 at 12:52 pm

    In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

    In most cases, home is seen as a harbor of happiness where people can kick back and ease their daily fatigue. As for the way of living, whether owning a personal home or just renting one differs from countries. Personally speaking, I am for the stance that owing a home is more crucial compared with renting one.

    To some points, renting an apartment isn’t as costly as buying one way of living provides the fast-paced lifestyle convenience on occasion of changing jobs. Thus, people can efficiently quit one for another, without concerning the matter of housekeeping as well as the mortgage. However, there exists entire difference between renting a home and claiming one. Mostly, owning house is viewed as a symbol of social status, whereas, people could easily lose a sense of belonging.

    By contrast, it is unnecessary for those people who have house ownership to worry about various unstable lifestyles. For example, they don’t have to calculate when the renting deadline is due, neither need they be anxious about what if the rented house gets damaged, etc. Apart from the feeling owning a house enables, purchasing a house allows you to take good advantage of the market, helping to earn the margin when the house price rockets higher. Additionally, only by making sure of your economic affordability can you successfully possess your personal residence could be a motivation for everyone to fight for their careers to earn more money instead of being homebodies stuck at home, aimlessly.

    From my perspective, I would like to earn a home entirely on my own. For those people who endeavor to own their houses, such intentions could potentially incentivize the promotion of the whole picture of the society.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    October 14, 2020 at 3:41 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. Article errors

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    Tara
    University: Zhejiang Formal Uni
    Nationality: China
    October 16, 2020 at 5:11 am

    In most cases, home is a token of happiness’s harbor where people can kick back and ease their daily fatigue. As for the way of living, whether owning a personal home or renting one differs from country to country. From my perspective, I am assuming that owning a home is more crucial than rent one.

    To some points, renting an apartment isn’t as costly as buying one. The rental way of living provides the fast-paced lifestyle convenience on changing jobs. Thus, people can alter their dwelling, without worrying the matter of housekeeping or mortgage. There exist some differences between renting a home and claiming one. Owning a house is a symbol of social status, whereas renting one means nothing but the repayment on a regular basis.

    For those who have house ownership, it is unnecessary for them to worry about various unstable lifestyles. For example, they don’t need to consider when the renting deadline is due, neither do they care about the rented house gets damaged. Apart from the sense of belonging owning a house could enable, buying one also allows you to take advantage of the market, helps you to earn the margin when the house price rockets higher. In addition, only by making sure of your economic affordability can you own your home. Hence, it can motivate people to fight for their careers to earn more money instead of being homebodies stuck at home, without any aim.

    In my opinion, I would like to earn a home of my own. For those who endeavor to own their houses, such intentions could incentivize the promotion of society’s whole picture.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    October 16, 2020 at 2:51 pm

    Score: 58.5

    Issues:

    1. About 30% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. Word choice errors – simplify some language
    3. Wordy – remove unnecessary words to make your essay clearer

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    Tara
    University: Zhejiang Formal Uni
    Nationality: China
    October 17, 2020 at 1:32 am

    In most cases, home is a token of happiness’s harbor where people can kick back and ease their daily fatigue. As for the way of living, whether owning a personal home or renting one differs from country to country. From my perspective, I am assuming that owning a home is more crucial than rent one.

    To some points, renting an apartment isn’t as costly as buying one. The rental way of living provides the fast-paced lifestyle convenience of changing jobs. Thus, people can change their apartment without worrying a matter of housekeeping or mortgage. There exist some differences between renting a home and claiming one. Owning a house is a symbol of social status, whereas renting one means nothing but the repayment in each month.

    For those who have house ownership, they don’t have to worry about various unstable lifestyles. For example, they don’t need to consider when the rental deadline is due, neither do they care about the rented apartment gets damaged. Apart from the sense of belonging owning a house could enable, buying one also allows you to take advantage of the market. Thus, you can earn the margin when the house price rockets higher. Only by making sure of your economic affordability can you own your home. Hence, it can motivate people to fight for their careers, then earning more money instead of being homebodies stuck at home, without any aim.

    In my opinion, I would like to earn a home of my own. For those who attempt to own their houses, such intentions could incentivize the society’s whole picture.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    October 19, 2020 at 4:42 pm

    Score: 61.9 (Partial revision – essay needs significant revision)

    In most cases, a home is a safe haven token of happiness’s harbor where people can kick back and ease their daily fatigue. As for the way of living, whether owning a personal home or renting one differs from country to country. From my perspective, I am assuming that owning a home is more crucial than rent one(Rephrase the previous sentence – clearly state your argument in your introduction)

    To some points, Renting an apartment isn’t is not as costly as buying one. The rental way of living Renting can allow you to change your job and location quickly, providing more flexibility provides the fast-paced lifestyle convenience of changing jobs. Thus, people can change their apartment without worrying a matter of housekeeping or mortgage. There exist some differences between renting a home and claiming one. Owning a house is a symbol of social status, whereas renting one means nothing but the repayment in each month.

    For those who have house ownership, they don’t have to worry about various unstable lifestyles. For example, they don’t need to consider when the rental deadline is due, neither do they care about the rented apartment gets damaged. Apart from the sense of belonging owning a house could enable, buying one also allows you to take advantage of the market. Thus, you can earn the margin when the house price rockets higher. Only by making sure of your economic affordability can you own your home. Hence, it can motivate people to fight for their careers, then earning more money instead of being homebodies stuck at home, without any aim.

    In my opinion, I would like to earn a home of my own. For those who attempt to own their houses, such intentions could incentivize the society’s whole picture.

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