In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

  • meganpage59
    University: Nanjing University
    Nationality: China
    October 29, 2020 at 11:41 am

    In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

    In some countries, it is of crucial importance to own a home rather than rent one. What are possible contributory factors to this phenomenon? As far as I am concerned, the reasons come down to two aspects——culture and economy.

    To begin with, people in different cultural environment possess different values apropos of housing problems. Many people in China prefer a relatively stable lifestyle, which renders them more predisposed to buying tangible assets such as real estates; whereas in western countries, people tend to attach more importance to “living in the moment”. There is also no gainsaying the fact that young people in western countries generally have a weaker “bond” with their parents economically than their Asian counterparts after growing up. Such financial limitation and different mentality altogether prompt them to rent houses, providing them with much freedom in mobility.

    The economic reason lies in different price levels in different economic entities. Housing prices in suburbs is often lower than that in city centers. A baronial mansion located in a small town of Nara is merely worth a 80-squaremeter apartment in Tokyo. What is more, The wage level should be able to keep abreast of the price level, because if they were incommensurate to each other in growth rate, one still could not purchase houses regardless of the cheap price.

    Subsequently, is this phenomenon a positive or negative signal? From my perspective, the benefits outweigh the harms. First of all, Genuinely owning a home is wiser in the long run, for this could guarantee people’s future life when they get married, raise children, and finally sit on the cusk of old age. In addition, it is a deal once and for all. It spares people the economic pressure and routine “harassment” imposed by landlords, thus allowing them to immerse themselves fully in personal development.

    In conclusion, this phenomenon is the ramification of heterogeneity of cultural views and economic systems among countries, and I concur with the viewpoints that this situation augurs well as it has the potential to ameliorate living quality and increase social welfare on the whole.

    November 3, 2020 at 10:09 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 30% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. Article errors
    3. Do not restate the question in your introduction, instead clearly state your argument

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    meganpage59
    University: Nanjing University
    Nationality: China
    November 4, 2020 at 2:25 am

    Thank you very much!