It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree?

  • Sherry
    University: XD University
    Nationality: China
    August 31, 2019 at 7:55 am

    TOEFL Writing Topic: It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to develop your essay.

    Living in the countryside or a big city both has their virtues and defects. Compared with adults, children tend to be easier affected by environment, so choosing the environment is essential for them. Hence there is a debate on growing up in the countryside and a big city which is better for children. In my view, growing up in both environments has benefits respectively.

    On one hand, children growing up in the countryside are blessed with a closer distance with nature. For the industry and economy are comparatively not very advanced, the environment in the countryside is better than in a big city. Furthermore, breathing fresh air and playing in nature frequently are advantageous for children’s both physical and mental health. In addition, social environment is purer in the countryside. Children would enjoy harmonious relationships with other people which is helpful for their mental construction.

    On the other hand, growing up in a big city would broaden children’s horizons. Teachers with greater ability and richer education experience are more abundant in big cities, thus children would enjoy higher quality of education. Growing in big cities paves the way for children to adapt fast pace modern lives. However, children living in big cites may have to withstand greater living pressure. Additionally, it is more possible for them to have poor eyesight due to overly using electronic devices.

    In conclusion, growing up in the countryside and big cities would bring different but positive influences to children. To me, these benefits play the same critical roles in children’s growth road. In this situation, I do not agree that it is better for children to grow up in the countryside.

    September 2, 2019 at 8:54 pm

    Score: 59.7

    I have sent you the screenshots in relation to errors/problems of your essay. Please revise your TOEFL essay and submit your essay again.

    Regards,

    Lin Qiu

     

    Sherry
    University: XD University
    Nationality: China
    September 3, 2019 at 12:10 pm

    Motified Version:

    Living in the countryside or a big city both have its virtues and defects. Compared with adults, children comparatively easier to be affected by environment. Choosing the environment is essential for them. However, there is a debate on growing up in the countryside and a big city which is better for children. In my view, growing up in these two environments has different benefits.

    On one hand, children growing up in the countryside can get closer to nature. For the industry and economy are comparatively not very advanced, the suburb environment is better than in a big city. Furthermore, breathing fresh air and playing in nature frequently are advantageous for children’s both physical and mental health. In addition, the environment of community is purer in the countryside. Children would enjoy harmonious relationships with other people, which is helpful for their mental construction.

    On the other hand, growing up in a big city would broaden children’s horizons. Teachers with higher ability and more abundant education experience are easier to be found in big cities thus children would enjoy higher quality of education. Moreover, growing in big cities paves the way for children to adapt fast-paced modern lives. However, they ought to withstand heavier living pressure at the same time. Additionally, the possibility for children to get poor eyesight might become higher due to overly using electronic devices.

    In conclusion, growing up in the countryside and big cities would bring different but positive influences to children. To me, these benefits play the same critical roles in children’s growth road. In this situation, I do not agree the statement that it is a better choice for children to grow up in the countryside.

    September 3, 2019 at 8:16 pm

    Score: 56.6.

    I will get back to you shortly.

    September 4, 2019 at 4:00 am

    Final Revision

    September 4, 2019 at 4:05 pm

    Final Revision: TOEFL Writing Topic: It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to develop your essay.
    Final Revision

    Living in the countryside or a big city has both its virtues and defects. Compared with adults, it is easier for children to be affected by the environment. Choosing the environment is essential for them. However, there is a debate about whether growing up in the countryside or a big city is better for children. In my view, growing up in these two environments has different benefits.

    On the one hand, children growing up in the countryside can get closer to nature since the industry and the economy are comparatively not very advanced, while the suburban environment is better than in a big city. Furthermore, breathing fresh air and playing in nature frequently are both advantageous for children’s physical and mental health. In addition, the environment in the community is purer in the countryside. Children can enjoy harmonious relationships with other people, which is helpful for their mental development.

    On the other hand, growing up in a big city can broaden children’s horizons. Teachers with higher ability and more abundant educational experience are more common in big cities; thus children would enjoy a higher quality of education. Moreover, growing in big cities paves the way for children to adapt fast-paced modern lives. However, they need to withstand heavier living pressure at the same time. Additionally, the possibility that children could get poor eyesight might become higher due to over-use of electronic devices.

    In conclusion, growing up in the countryside and big cities would have different but positive influences on children. To me, these benefits play the same critical roles in terms of children’s growth. In this situation, I do not agree with the statement that it is a better choice for children to grow up in the countryside.