It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sorts of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sorts of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?

  • Landry
    University: Donghua University
    Nationality: China
    March 18, 2020 at 12:18 pm

    It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sorts of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?

    Nowadays, more and more people agree that children should know how to distinguish right and wrong, and punishment is beneficial to them. I believe that punishment is useful if punishment intensity can be controlled.

    Children always feel painful when they are punished, and I think the feeling play a important role in how to distinguish right and wrong. Parents punish their children when they make a mistake. The punishment make children unpleasant, so they will not do the same things. Everyone hopes that they could live in a enjoyable and comfortable life. In the way, children know that they have done are wrong.

    Sometimes punishment is harmful to children if we ignore the punishment intensity. some parents always think their children are so strong so that they could hit their children at random, but they do not know that this behavior will cause damage to both body and mentality. No one ensure that this behavior will not lead to permanent lesion. Therefore, I wish that all the parents could treat their children friendly and reasonably.

    There are many suitable ways to punish children rather than damage them. For parents, I think reducing the pocket money and the computer game playtime would be good ways. For teachers, assigning more homework also be a good choice if the homework is possibly finished. These behaviors can make them unhappy rather than harmful. To some extent, they are beneficial to children even could let them focus on their study.

    Overall, if we could consider the intensity, punishment is also a good way to help children learn the distinction.

    March 21, 2020 at 1:05 am

    Score: Ungraded

    Issues:

    1. Grammatical errors.
    2. More than 10% of the sentences are passive. Convert them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    Landry
    University: Donghua University
    Nationality: China
    March 21, 2020 at 3:02 pm

    Nowadays, more and more people agree that children should realize how to distinguish right and wrong, and discipline is beneficial to them. I believe that punishment is very effective way as long as we could control the intensity.

    Children always feel unhappy when they get punishment, and I claim feeling play a vital role in how to distinguish right and wrong. Parents punish their children when they make a mistake. Discipline makes children unpleasant, so they will not do the same things. Everyone hopes that they could live in enjoyable and comfortable life. In the way, children know that they have done are wrong.

    Sometimes punishment is harmful to children if we ignore the severity of that. Some parents always think that they could hit their children at will, but they do not know that this behavior will cause damage to both body and mentality. No one ensures that this behavior will not lead to permanent lesion. Hence, I wish that all the parents could treat their children friendly.

    There are many suitable ways to punish children rather than damage them. For parents, I think reducing the pocket money and the computer game playtime would be good ways. For teachers, assigning more homework also be a good means if the homework is possibly finished. These behaviors can make them unhappy rather than harmful. To some extent, they are beneficial to children even could let them focus on their study.

    To sum up, if we could consider the intensity, sentence is also a good method to help children learn the distinction.

     

    March 21, 2020 at 4:26 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Nowadays, more and more people [ wordy ] agree that children should realize [ improper word ]how to distinguish right and wrong, [ punctuation error ]and [ missing a pronoun ]discipline is beneficial to them[unclear pronoun  ]. I believe that punishment is[ article error ] very effective way as long as we could control the intensity[unclear  ].

    Children always feel unhappy when they get punishment[ word form error ], and [logically disconnected with the prior sentence due to the shit of subject  ]I claim feeling play[ grammatical error ] a vital role in how to distinguish right and wrong. Parents punish their children when they[unclear pronoun  ] make a mistake. Discipline makes children unpleasant, so they will not do the same things[logically unsupportive  ]. Everyone hopes that they could live in [article error  ]enjoyable and comfortable life. In the way[wrong phrase  ], children know that they have done are wrong[ grammatically wrong ].

    Sometimes punishment is harmful to children if we ignore the severity of that[ logically confusing ]. Some parents always think that they could hit their children at will, but they do not know that this behavior will cause damage to both body and mentality[ logically incomplete ]. No one[confusing/shift of person  ] ensures that this behavior will not lead to [ article error ]permanent lesion. Hence, I wish that all the parents could treat their children friendly.

    There are many suitable ways to punish children rather than damage[ wrong word ] them. For parents, I think reducing the pocket money[ unclear ] and the computer game playtime [ unclear ]would be good ways. For teachers, assigning more homework also be a good means[ grammatical error ] if the homework is possibly finished[unclear  ]. These behaviors can make them[ unclear pronoun ] unhappy rather than harmful. To some extent, they [ unclear pronoun ]are beneficial to children even could let them focus on their study[ grammatical error ].

    To sum up, if we could consider the intensity[ incomplete ], sentence is [grammatical error with subjunctive voice  ]also a good method to help children learn the distinction.