It is more important for governments to spend money to improve Internet access than to improve public transportation. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing It is more important for governments to spend money to improve Internet access than to improve public transportation. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  • Elena L
    University: University of International Business and Economics
    Nationality: China
    February 3, 2021 at 7:31 am

    It is more important for governments to spend money to improve Internet access than to improve public transportation. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

    Nowadays, there is a growing demand for Internet usage. In this case, the quality of Internet access seems to be essential. Some people claim that improving Internet access is the duty for individuals or Internet companies instead of governments, and at the same time, governments should spend money to improve public transportation. However, I believe the other way around.

    First of all, improving Internet access meets the requirement of developing science and technology. As we know that science and technology has become the main topics since 2000, and almost every government is making efforts in order to improve their technology in network. For example, 5G is being commonly used these days, and the government of my country has already setting up some Internet facilities, which provide the whole country with a better Internet environment with higher speed and more comfortable experience while surfing the Internet. What the government has completed not only improves Internet access, but also reinforces the reputation of my country because of the up-to-date technology.

    Secondly, promoting the development of Internet access is indeed money and energy consuming. At the beginning, we have to hire some engineers to discovery the new technology, and then we will face the challenges coming from setting the sites to build the Internet facilities, after that, workers will be needed to build those facilities. Money and energy is necessary during the whole process, which cannot be finished without the financial support from governments. For example, spending money will be used to offer salaries to workers, purchasing building materials and prepare for the transportation or emergency.

    It is admitted that spending money on public transportation is important, as public transportation means a lot for us to commute or hang out. However, in many countries, public transportation has already developed quite well, it is time for governments to pay more attention to Internet access which has not been developed for a long period of time.

    In conclusion, improving Internet access is the right field for governments to spend money on.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    February 5, 2021 at 3:00 am

    Score: 44.4

    Issues:

    1. About 55% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them. (TOEFL/IELTS: 15%- qualifies for non-software revision; 30% applies to GRE writing)
    2. About 20% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. (10%- qualifies for non-software TOEFL/IELTS/GRE writing revision )

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    Elena L
    University: University of International Business and Economics
    Nationality: China
    February 8, 2021 at 10:49 am

    Nowadays, there is a growing demand for Internet usage. We need to surf the Internet, browse many websites for information and chat with our friends or relatives everyday. In this case, the quality of Internet access seems to be essential. Some people claim that improving Internet access is the duty of individuals or Internet companies instead of governments. At the same time, governments should spend money to improve public transportation. However, I believe the other way around.

    First of all, improving Internet access meets the requirement of developing science and technology. As we know, science and technology have become the main topics since 2000. Meanwhile, almost every government is making efforts to improve their technology in the network. For example, 5G is commonly used these days, and the government of my country has already set up some Internet facilities. These provide the whole country with a better Internet environment with higher speed and more comfortable experience while surfing the Internet. What the government has completed not only improves Internet access but also reinforces the reputation of my country because of the up-to-date technology.

    Secondly, promoting the development of Internet access is indeed money and energy-consuming. In the beginning, we have to hire some engineers to discover the new technology, and then we will face the challenges coming from setting the sites to build the Internet facilities. After that, workers will be needed to build those facilities. Only with the financial support from governments can we finish the whole process. For example, we can use the investment to offer salaries to workers, purchase building materials or prepare for some emergency.

    Admittedly, spending money on public transportation is essential, as public transportation means a lot for us to commute or hang out. However, public transportation has already developed quite well in many countries. So it is time for governments to pay more attention to Internet access that has not been developed perfectly.

    In conclusion, improving Internet access is the right field for governments to spend money.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    February 8, 2021 at 9:14 pm

    Nowadays, there is a growing demand for Internet usage. We need to surf the Internet, browse many websites for information and chat with our friends or relatives everyday. In this case, the quality of Internet access seems to be essential. Some people claim that improving Internet access is the duty of individuals or Internet companies instead of governments. At the same time, governments [, which, as they argue, ]should spend money to improve public transportation. However, [with respect, however,  ]I believe the other way around.

    First of all, improving Internet access meets the requirement of developing science and technology[ can facilitate scientific and technological development ]. (As we know)[redundant  ],( science and technology have become the main topics since 2000)[  unclear]. Meanwhile, almost every government is making efforts to improve their [ pronoun error ]technology in the network. For example, 5G is commonly used these days[absolute statement/specify the context  ], and the[ Chinese ] government[/China  ] of my country has already set up some Internet facilities. These[ , which ] provide the whole country with a better Internet environment (with higher speed and more comfortable experience while surfing the Internet)[confusion/ environment — high/fast speed… who is surfing?  ]. (What the government has completed)[replace this with a noun phrase  ] not only improves Internet access but also (reinforces the reputation)[ unclear ] of my country[China  ] because of the up-to-date technology [ use this phrase as subject ].

    Secondly, (promoting the development of)[ use one word ] Internet access is indeed (money and energy-consuming)[word structure issue  ].( In the beginning)[wrong phrase  ], we have to hire some engineers to discover[/develop  ] the[ article error ] new technology, and then we will face [need to address  ]the[ article error ] challenges coming[ranging  ] from (setting the sites)[unclear  ] to build[ing  ] the[ article error ] Internet facilities. After that, (workers will be needed)[passive/shift of subject  ] to build those facilities. Only with the[ article error ] financial support from governments[ word form error ] can we finish[/complete  ] the whole process. For example, we can use the investment to offer salaries to workers, purchase building materials or prepare for some emergency.

    Admittedly, spending money on public transportation is essential, as public transportation( means a lot for us to commute or hang out)[repetition/ means a lot = commute or hang out  ]. However, [since  ] public transportation has already [ is well ]developed quite well in many countries. So [,  ]it is time for governments[word form error  ] to (pay more attention to)[replace with one verb  ] Internet access that has not been developed perfectly.

    In conclusion, improving Internet access is the right field for governments[word form error  ] to spend money [ on ].

    [In general description, use government instead of governments.  ]