Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

  • han_Again
    University: dalian maritime university
    March 4, 2020 at 12:02 pm

    Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

    Social networking sites such as facebook and twitter, are thought by some to have had a detrimental influence on both individuals and society. In my perspective, I totally disagree with this point of view. I think social media can bring more benefits than pitfalls.

    With regards of individuals, the advantages that social network can produce are clear. On the one hand, individuals can use social medias to share ideas. Specifically, for those who have no chance to make friends with other countries, social media provides a channel to them to have a communication with people from different intellectual or cultural backgrounds without leaving home. On the other hand, people can also learn more information that they cannot learn through newspaper and television, which can help stimulate diverse thinking and encourage express themselves.

    As for society, in my opinion, the blessing can overtake the curse. Acturally, there is a risk for people to pay too much attention on social networking sites while ignore their own communities in real life and lose the opportunities to talk with others face to face. But meanwhile, digital trace in social medias makes the opinions of every individual person become increasing essencial. For instance, the government begins to follow the trend of result in twitter about the presidental selection. As well as, the sina weibo in china has become an important method to learn about the latest news of coronavirus.

    In conclusion, although there are still some potential danger of social networking sites, I believe they generate more benefits and to pocket all the rewards from the development of them, we should take them with a more proper attitude. Use them to help us, but not rely on them .

    March 4, 2020 at 3:29 pm

    Score: 55.8

    Issues:

    1. More than 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.