Nature’s Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products, is opening its next franchise in the town of Plainesville.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. GRE Writing Nature’s Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products, is opening its next franchise in the town of Plainesville.

  • onlytobegood1
    University: sisu
    Nationality: China
    June 30, 2020 at 11:03 pm

    Nature’s Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products, is opening its next franchise in the town of Plainesville. The store should prove to be very successful: Nature’s Way franchises tend to be most profitable in areas where residents lead healthy lives, and clearly Plainesville is such an area. Plainesville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at all-time highs. The local health club has more members than ever, and the weight training and aerobics classes are always full. Finally, Plainesville’s schoolchildren represent a new generation of potential customers: these schoolchildren are required to participate in a fitness-for-life program, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age.

    Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

    Merely based on unfounded assumptions and dubious evidence, the statement draws the conclusion that Nature’s Way will be successful. To substantiate the conclusion, the arguer points out evidence that Nature’s Way had opened its health-related franchise in a place where residences live a healthy lifestyle. To illustrate that, he lists several pieces of evidence to show how the residence in Plainsville emphasis physical health and therefore provided grounds for the store’s prosperity. At first glance, the author’s argument appears to be somewhat convincing, but further reflection reveals that it omits some substantial concerns that should be addressed to substantiate the argument. In my point of view, this argument suffers from three logical flaws.

    The arguments list three pieces of evidence to illustrate his position, but they are all dubious. At first, the argument assumes too hastily that the high sales of running shoes and exercise clothing will necessarily result in the conclusion that the residences of the Plainsville are all sport-lover action man. This prediction omits other explanations of the high sales volume. Perhaps, most of the locals buy the exercise clothing because it’s inexpensive, or because it’s the fashion for them to wear the exercise closing. The high sales in exercising clothing can’t convince me that the locals like exercising, and therefore make the author’s argument ill-founded.

    The author’s second attempt to support his argument also fails. The argument observes a correlation between the capacity attendance in local clubs and the local fervor in exercising, then concludes that the former could support the latter. However, the argument rules out other possible explanations for a large number of people in the clubs. For example, the club probably pays for the people to exercise in their club, which is a trick often played in restaurants or snack bars to secure more customers. Even if the customer data is true and accurate, solely the weight training and aerobics classes can’t indicate that the locals like exercising, for these two sections are always full in the club, whereas at the same time the data of people who did Muscle training exercise could truly decide whether the indigene love taking physical training or not. All my speculations might lead to the other explanation of the consumer data in the clubs. Without ruling out all other factors it is unfair to conclude that the locals love sports, let alone infer that the retails will make money.

    At last, the author claims that Plainsville’s schoolchildren also indicate that the retails store will make money, because the children are the potential customers, for they’re required to exercise and taught to do so in the future. The author assumes without justification that the background conditions have remained the same over extended periods of time. For example, the author assumes that the children will obviously participate in exercise because the teacher told them so in their early days; however, the children probably hate the program and therefore reluctant to exercise any more in the future, for they are forced to do so when they are young, or it is possible that the children create other habits instead of exercising. Any of these scenarios, if true, would serve to undermine the claim that the children will be the potential consumers in the future, and therefore makes his claim more invalid.

    To sum up, this arguer fails to substantiate its claim that the retails will thrive on account of the locals’ enthusiasm towards sport because the evidence cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the arguer maintains. To make the argument more convincing, the arguer would have to provide more information with regard to what indicators verify that the local love exercise. If the argument had included the given factors discussed above, it would have been more thorough and logically acceptable.

    July 1, 2020 at 11:42 pm

    Score: 41.7

    Issues:

    1. About 65% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. Lengthy paragraphs. Restrict each paragraph to 100 words.
    4. Lots of grammatical and logical problems.
    5. The essay is unnecessarily lengthy.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.