Nowadays, it is easier and more affordable for people to visit other countries, is it a positive or negative development?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Nowadays, it is easier and more affordable for people to visit other countries, is it a positive or negative development?

  • @Lucy
    University: 河池学院
    Nationality: China
    March 7, 2021 at 9:40 am

    Recently, people find it easier and cheaper to travel to other countries, attributed to the development of transport. Although this phenomenon may have several drawbacks, it still bring many benefits to the public.

    When people don’t have to go abroad at a high cost, the tourism will develop at a rapid speed, along with many positive outcomes. Foremost, the growing number of foreigners will create a large sum of profits for a country because of accomondation and consumption of daily supplies. Besides economic effects, the country which was remote and difficult to reach due to expensive transport will become more accessible, thus it will be famous for its local goods through spreads of foreign visitors. Also, it’s easier for visitors to travel a lot and view different kinds of landscapes, which will help broden their horizons. And the visitors will experience the combination of their homelands’ culture and other countries’ customs as well.

    On the other hand, this development may result in many unimaginable outcomes. First of all, too many visitors may pose a threat to local environment caused by more pollution, such as carbon dioxide produced by local transportion system cater to foreigners. Secondly, goverments cannot always give priority to local residents, as visitors have to take up public service from time to time, which causes damage to local people’s welfare. Meanwhile, inexpensive transport may attract illegal migrates who will cause the rise of criminal rate and do harm to social stability in return. For example, due to the cheap ship fees, many parts of world have witnessed the increase of illegal migration along with much more cost spent on maintaing social stability.

    In conclusion, while this developmet causes many negative results, its prospective advantages cannot be ignored both on visitors and countries.

    March 8, 2021 at 10:52 pm

    Score: 50.6

    Issues:

    1. About 60% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Simplify or split them. (TOEFL/IELTS: 15%- qualifies for non-software revision; 30% applies to GRE writing)
    2. Lots of grammatical errors.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    March 8, 2021 at 10:53 pm

    On hold