In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

  • Rain
    University: Liaoning
    Nationality: Chinese
    October 23, 2020 at 2:19 am

    In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

    In the fast-paced and pressed era, it seems that people are fighting for a common goal: owning a home. Even if the fact is that the majority of youngsters are still renting a house, people still believe renting is temporary and buying their own home becomes the most significant thing in their lives.

    Many reasons can explain the house-buying spree. Firstly, from the psychology point of view, owning a home is a sign of success and a measure of social status. It has been widely perceived that wealthy people should process their own houses. The more and the bigger the houses are, the richer he/she is. In other words, owning such properties make individuals feel a sense of achievement as well as a sense of belonging. For the aspect of economics, due to the high inflation nowadays, cash is heavily depreciated. More and more people realized that real estate can be a way to add value in the future. As a result, the house is regarded as a financial tool and sees a large demanded in the market. Lastly, take China as an example, the house has become a necessity in a marriage from the cultural point of view. Usually, the male is supposed to prepare a house. Otherwise, the female will not marry him.

    In my opinion, the paranoid mindset has negative impacts. As people value the home too much, the price of the house increases dramatically in recent years, which puts much more pressure on youngsters and their families. In addition, by constructing excessive buildings, the land is overdeveloped with few green lands are left. The ecological environment is under threat.

    To sum up, people should reform the traditional conception. Renting a home can also lead to a happy life. It cannot only relieve the living stress by spending less but is a circular economic lifestyle that is encouraged to pursue.

    October 25, 2020 at 1:14 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. Lots of grammatical errors. 
    2. About 40% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.