Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

  • zhangxiang
    University: Beijing University of Technology
    Nationality: China
    December 31, 2020 at 9:41 am

    Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

    Nowadays, there is a perception held by educationalist that it is beneficial to children to start learning a foreign language before secondary school. For my part, the merits of this trend prevail over its demerits.

    It’s undeniable that those who oppose to my idea also have their reasons to some extent. Children who are between 6 and 12 years old are too young to study a foreign language. To be more specific, their brains are still programmed to acquire their mother tongue. What’s more, primary school is a place which enables kids to have plenty of entertainment, currently, the curriculum of primary school has already put a heavy burden on kids and squeezed their leisure time. Additional courses will partly increase their stress.

    On the contrary, the drawbacks of learning a foreign language earlier should not be neglected. In the first place, learning a language must be a long journey for everyone. It’s better for kids to have six more years to lay a solid foundation so that they won’t have to experience a tough time in learning foreign language several years later. In other words, the accumulation of vocabulary will facilitate their learning subsequently. Moreover, they may also gain a better awareness of other cultures by using idioms and conversing with foreigners.

    Overall, different views have been carefully discussed. It’s my firm belief that there are more upsides to this statement. It’s therefore highly proposed that starting to study a foreign language from primary school is beneficial to children.

    January 8, 2021 at 3:23 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 20% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. 
    2. Some grammatical errors.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    zhangxiang
    University: Beijing University of Technology
    Nationality: China
    January 9, 2021 at 9:05 am

    Nowadays, there is a perception held by educationalists that it is beneficial for children to start learning a foreign language before secondary school. For my part, the merits of this trend prevail over its demerits.

    It’s undeniable that those who oppose to my idea also have their reasons to some extent. Children who are between 6 and 12 years old are too young to study a foreign language. To be more specific, their brains are still programmed to acquire their mother tongue. What’s more, primary school is a place where it enables kids to have plenty of entertainment. Currently, the curriculum of primary school has already put a heavy burden on kids and squeezed their leisure time. Additional courses will partly increase their stress.

    On the contrary, the drawbacks of learning a foreign language earlier should not be neglected. In the first place, learning a language must be a long journey for everyone. It’s better for kids to have six more years to lay a solid foundation so that they won’t have to experience a tough time in learning a foreign language several years later. In other words, the accumulation of vocabulary will facilitate their learning subsequently. Moreover, they may also gain a better awareness of other cultures by using idioms and conversing with foreigners.

    Overall, different views have been carefully discussed. It’s my firm belief that there are more upsides to this statement. It’s therefore highly proposed that starting to study a foreign language from primary school is beneficial to children.

    January 10, 2021 at 3:41 am

    Nowadays, (there is a perception held by educationalists) [ wordy – avoid using there..be  ] that it[unclear pronoun/redundant/ avoid using it is..   ] is beneficial for[wordy, ineffective/ using verb   ] children to start learning a foreign language before secondary school. For my part, the merits of this trend [wrong word   ] prevail over its demerits.

    (It’s undeniable)[ wordy  ] that those who oppose to [ preposition error  ] my idea (also have their reasons to some extent)[ redundant  ] . Children who are between 6 and 12 years old are too young to study a foreign language. To be more specific, their brains are (still programmed)[unclear/use literal writing   ] to acquire their mother tongue. What’s more, primary school is a place where it [ unclear pronoun  ] enables kids to have plenty of entertainment. (Currently, the curriculum of primary school has already put a heavy burden)[ factual error  ] on kids and squeezed their leisure time. Additional courses will partly [ unclear  ] increase their stress.

    On the contrary, the drawbacks of learning a foreign language earlier should not be neglected[passive   ] . In the first place, learning a language must be a long journey for everyone. It’s[unclear pronoun   ] better for kids to have six more years to lay a solid foundation so that they won’t have to experience a tough time in learning a foreign language several years later. In other words, the accumulation of vocabulary will facilitate their learning subsequently. Moreover, they may also gain a better awareness of other cultures by using idioms and conversing with foreigners.

    Overall, different views have been carefully discussed[ passive/redundant  ] . It’s[ unclear pronoun  ] my firm belief that there are more[more.. than   ] upsides to this statement. It’s [ unclear pronoun  ] therefore highly proposed [ passive/redundant  ] that starting to study a foreign language from primary school( is beneficial)[  use a verb to replace BE verb ] to children.

    January 10, 2021 at 3:19 pm

    Score: 53