Some students prefer to study alone. Others prefer to study with a group of students. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Score: 57

Issues:

1. About 30% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.

I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

Score: 60.3

Currently, the wide[wrong word  ] popularity of cooperative assignments has aroused a heated discussion[factual error  ]. There are many divergent views on their [ unclear pronoun ]effectiveness. Personally speaking[ redundant ], I suppose that collaboration between students can enhance their work productivity and quality.

Firstly, when students work together, they tend to finish their tasks in a more productive manner. Because group members can divide the target project into several parts and then take on suitable roles[ grammatical error ]. In this way, students can work on their tasks simultaneously. It[ unclear pronoun ] is conducive to reducing unnecessary waste of time. Meanwhile, other students can function as (a helpful supervisor)[grammatical error  ]. To be more specific, students [unclear/specify  ]will be [dull BE verb  ]more concentrated on their work in that they don’t want to be condemned by[ passive ] their partners. As a result, the efficiency of their work will skyrocket.

Secondly, in terms of decision making[ word form error ], working together contributes to reducing[ word form error ] mistakes. A case in point is that I worked on a research project about developments [word form error  ]of architecture in China last year. [ punctuation error with coordinating word ]But most of us didn’t [ Use of NOT ]major in this subject area. [ punctuation error concerning coordinating word ]So we almost made a serious error in our decision making[ word form error ]. Fortunately, one of my partners corrected our fault in time, whose[word dislocation  ] father is a talented architect. Thanks to her and her father’s aid, we could [ redundant ]finally win an award. It[ unclear pronoun ] reveals that working with diverse[ wrong word ] students helps [ absolute writing ]students make [wrong word  ]a more sensible resolution and decrease the odds of mistakes.

However, there is no denying the fact that studying in a group may lead to distraction[ wordy ]. [ punctuation error concerning coordinating word ]But then again, the disadvantages of group study pale[uncommon word  ] in comparison to [ lack a modifier ]advantages. As long as students effectively monitor each other’s work progress, working together could be a better choice[ logical incompleteness ].

In a nutshell[ Use literal word instead ], teamwork is beneficial [ Be verb – concrete verb ]to students’ work effectiveness and efficiency. Only doing so, can we expect to cultivate an army[  use literal word instead] of both competent and versatile students[ wrong word ] for the future.

Writing Tips

1. Absolute Statement: Avoid using absolute statement.
2. ARTICLE ERROR: errors concerning a, an, the. This is a prominent issue for Chinese students. Make sure to add/remove/change articles considering a specific context.
3. BE VERBS: BE verbs are dull and vague. Use concrete verbs to replace BE verbs whenever needed. I.E. commercials are beneficial to children. – Commercials benefit children.
4. COHERENCE: To improve the natural flow from one sentence to the other, make the subject of a sentence echo the subject, or the object, of the last sentence.
5. COORDINATING CONJUNCTION error: In formal writing, a comma is needed when the 7 coordinating words (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so – FANBOYS) are connecting sentences/clauses.
6. Effectiveness: use verbs instead of BE+adjectives to improve effectiveness.
7. Grammatical Errors: grammatical mistakes.
8. It + Be + Verb:  Wordy.
9. Logical confusion. Although a sentence is grammatically correct, often it is logically/factually confusing. Having written a sentence, ask yourself if the sentence is logically complete, and/or factually true.
10. NOT problem. Experienced writers often avoid using NOT in English writing. I.e. Jack was very upset because he had not passed the GRE test. – I.e. Jack was very upset because he had failed the GRE test.
11. PASSIVE VOICE: In many cases, clarity suffers when using passive voice. In particular linguistic contexts, using passive voice is fine.
12. Semicolon: Use a semicolon in front of an adverb/adverbial phrase.
13. Subjunctive: Memorize the grammatical rules for subjunctive mood.
14. There Be Sentence: Wordy
15. Unclear Pronouns: A pronoun (it, this, that, they, them., etc) unclearly refers to the prior content. For example, the first sentence contains two singular nouns, so IT in the second sentence can refer either of them.
16. Unparalleled Structure:  use paralleled structures, including tense.
17. VERBOSE: The sentence/phrase can be simplified.
18. WEAK VERBS: an alternative verb may help improve sentence effectiveness and clarity. The Internet makes us know many things. – The Internet helps us (to) know many things.