Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

  • vander
    University: GDUFS
    Nationality: China
    February 10, 2020 at 3:06 pm

    Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

    Some famous sports stars are reported to earn a huge amount of money which is even more than other important professions. It leads to a dispute about whether it is fair for them to get such money.

    Some people justify their earnings with the reason that they are models for teenagers or even the whole society. They can only achieve success after years of tough training, which encourages people especially teenagers to work hard like their idols. Therefore, sports professionals like Kobe Bryant are worthy of their salaries for their great influence on society and with money or other rewards, they will strive harder to achieve success and have a more positive effect on society.

    Opponents, however, hold the view that they do not deserve the money for people in other essential professions contribute no less than star athletes. The society functions well because of the hard work in various areas including sports and others like medicine and science research. Doctors save thousands of people’s lives and scientists unveil the unknown in the universe for us, which are both great contributions to society.Thus, there is no reason for star athletes to get more rewards than other professionals.

    In my opinion, the high income of sports professionals seems unfair for talents in other professions may feel undervalued with lower income. The salaries are, to some degree, social recognition for people’s abilities and achievements. People will possibly choose to get involved in sports profession so as to get recognised and thereby other fields of society may be less focused, which causes a shortage of human resources. To avoid the above consequence, we should ensure people in all professions get paid fairly so that society will function in a balanced way.

    February 14, 2020 at 8:36 pm

    Score: 57.4

    Issues:

    1. More than 80% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. Nearly 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    vander
    University: GDUFS
    Nationality: China
    February 23, 2020 at 4:47 pm

    Nowadays, a famous sports star may earn much more salary than experts in other essential fields. It leads to a dispute about whether it is fair for them to get such money.

    Some people justify their earnings with the reason that they are models for teenagers or even the whole society. Top sports stars, like Kobe Bryant, achieved success with their persistence and diligence. They won champions out of thousands of international competitors, bringing the great honor to their nations. Moreover, their stories encourage people, especially teenagers, to work hard like their idols. Nevertheless, with money or other rewards, they will strive harder to gain success and have a more positive effect on society.

    Opponents, however, hold the view that they do not deserve the money for people in other professions contribute no less than star athletes. The society functions well because of the hard work in various aspects, including sports and others like medicine and science research. Doctors save thousands of people’s lives, and scientists unveil the unknown in the universe for us, which are both great contributions to society. They did their job in obscurity while star athletes gain fame and huge rewards.

    From my point of view, I understand why sports professionals can gain generous wages but it suggests society values them more than other professionals. The salaries are, to some degree, social recognition for people’s abilities and achievements. I am afraid people working in other crucial domains of society will feel less recognised and motivated with such a payment gap still existing. If we want society to function in a balanced way, we should eliminate the gap stimulating all social members to dig deep into their own areas of expertise.

    February 24, 2020 at 10:27 pm

    Score: 61.8

    Issues:

    1. About 50% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.