Teachers were more appreciated and valued

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Teachers were more appreciated and valued

  • Debbie
    University: NKU
    Nationality: China
    April 19, 2019 at 2:08 am

    TOEFL TOPIC: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teacher were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they were nowadays.

    Our society has changed greatly during the past 100 years in terms of people’s perspectives on different jobs. Being a teacher, which was a decent and meaningful job in the past, seems no longer valued nowadays because of two reasons.

    Teacher do not get sufficient income compared with other occupations like banker, engineer or trader, which to a large extent discourage students to engage in teaching after graduation and make this job less appreciated. If you ask a college student what career he would like to choose, the answer would not probably be a teacher because teaching is not a profitable or promising job.

    Today, the living pressure has increased dramatically, especially in major cities, and every person necessitates a well-paid job to sustain high standard of living. Just take a look at how the hike of housing price in Beijing has made lots of people frustrated about their lives. Therefore, since teaching has stood as one of jobs with lowest payments in the society, it is impossible for a teacher to live a well-off life in big cities.

    Furthermore, based on the fact that in current society people always judge others by their financial condition, the salary of a job matters a lot for people. As a result, the more profitable a job is, the more popular and desirable the job will be. That explains the ruthless phenomenon that teacher were less appreciated by the society nowadays than past.

    Another reason is that the development of technology has enabled us to learn knowledge by ourselves so that teaching seems no more necessary in the society now than past. For example, if I want to learn calculus, I can simply look it up via Internet and Wikipedia tells me everything about it. It is inconvenient and unnecessary for me to ask for my math teacher. Although Internet has its limitation that it cannot solve every problem we have, we have to admit that technology has replaced a great amount of work of teacher.

    However, many social members were illiterate in the past caused by the lack of education and limited resources. Teacher, whose mission is to educate and enlighten people, were regarded as noble and respectful at that time. When time has elapsed and technology is woven into the fabric of our daily lives, teachers lose their previous prestige and become ordinary.

    Based on the analysis above, it is concluded that nowadays teacher are no longer valued and appreciated by people of a society. Despite teacher’s social status, I believe the government should restore their prestige and condition, otherwise our society would face a serious educational problem in near future.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    April 19, 2019 at 1:02 pm

    You removed my WeChat contact?

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    April 19, 2019 at 5:17 pm

    Our society has changed greatly during the past 100 years in terms of people’s perspectives on different jobs. Being a teacher, which was a decent and meaningful job in the past, seems no longer valued nowadays because of two reasons.

    Teacher (ERROR ) do not get sufficient income compared with other occupations like banker, engineer or trader, which to a large extent discourage students to engage in teaching after graduation and make this job less appreciated. If you ask a college student what career he would like to choose, the answer would not probably be a teacher because teaching is not a profitable or promising job.

    Today, the living pressure has increased dramatically, especially in major cities, and every person necessitates a well-paid job to sustain (ERROR ) high standard of living. Just take a look at how the hike of housing price in Beijing has made lots of people frustrated about their lives. Therefore, since teaching has stood as one of (ERROR ) jobs with (ERROR ) lowest payments in the society, it is impossible for a teacher to live a well-off life in big cities.

    Furthermore, based on the fact that in current society people always judge others by their financial condition, the salary of a job matters a lot for people. As a result, the more profitable a job is, the more popular and desirable the job will be. That explains the ruthless phenomenon that teacher (ERROR ) were less appreciated by the society nowadays than (ERROR ) past.

    Another reason is that the development of technology has enabled us to learn knowledge by ourselves so that teaching seems no more necessary in the society now than 7past. For example, if I want to learn calculus, I can simply look it up via 8Internet and Wikipedia tells me everything about it. It is inconvenient and unnecessary for me to ask for my math teacher. Although (ERROR ) Internet has its limitation that it cannot solve every problem we have, we have to admit that technology has replaced a great amount of work of (ERROR )  teacher.

    However, many social members were illiterate in the past caused by the lack of education and limited resources. Teacher, whose mission is to educate and enlighten people, were regarded as noble and respectful at that time. When time has elapsed and technology is woven into the fabric of our daily lives, teachers lose their previous prestige and become ordinary.

    Based on the analysis above, it is concluded that nowadays (ERROR ) teacher (ERROR ) are no longer valued and appreciated by people of a society. Despite teacher’s social status, I believe the government should restore their prestige and condition, otherwise(ERROR ) our society would face a serious educational problem in (ERROR ) near future.

    —————–

    Having removed some grammatical errors (many grammatical errors, logical/factual inconsistencies remain.)

    Our society has changed greatly during the past 100 years in terms of people’s perspectives on different jobs. Being a teacher, which was a decent and meaningful job in the past, seems no longer valued nowadays because of two reasons.

    Teacher does not get sufficient income compared with other occupations like banker, engineer or trader, which to a large extent discourage students to engage in teaching after graduation and make this job less appreciated. If you ask a college student what career he would like to choose, the answer would not probably be a teacher because teaching is not a profitable or promising job.

    Today, the living pressure has increased dramatically, especially in major cities, and every person necessitates a well-paid job to sustain a high standard of living. Just take a look at how the hike of housing price in Beijing has made lots of people frustrated about their lives. Therefore, since teaching has stood as one of the jobs with the lowest payments in the society, it is impossible for a teacher to live a well-off life in big cities.

    Furthermore, based on the fact that in current society people always judge others by their financial condition, the salary of a job matters a lot for people. As a result, the more profitable a job is, the more popular and desirable the job will be. That explains the ruthless phenomenon that teacher was less appreciated by the society nowadays than the past.

    Another reason is that the development of technology has enabled us to learn knowledge by ourselves so that teaching seems no more necessary in the society now than in the past. For example, if I want to learn calculus, I can simply look it up via the Internet and Wikipedia tells me everything about it. It is inconvenient and unnecessary for me to ask for my math teacher. Although the Internet has its limitation that it cannot solve every problem we have, we have to admit that technology has replaced a great amount of work of a teacher.

    However, many social members were illiterate in the past caused by the lack of education and limited resources. Teacher, whose mission is to educate and enlighten people, were regarded as noble and respectful at that time. When time has elapsed and technology is woven into the fabric of our daily lives, teachers lose their previous prestige and become ordinary.

    Based on the analysis above, it is concluded that nowadays the teacher is no longer valued and appreciated by people of a society. Despite the teacher’s social status, I believe the government should restore their prestige and condition; otherwise, our society would face a serious educational problem in the near future.

    Score: 55

    Suggestions for Improvement:

    • Minimize the number of passive-voice sentences;
    • Reduce the number of sentences exceeding 20 words to less than 10% (2/3 of the sentences exceed 20 words);
    • Reduce essay length to 320 words;
    • Improve writing accuracy and effectiveness. (I.E. Our society has changed greatly during the past 100 years in terms of people’s perspectives on different jobs. – During the prior century, people’s occupational perspectives have changed significantly.)

    Rewrite and re-upload your essay.