Teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  • feifeifeifay
    University: SISU
    Nationality: China
    December 16, 2020 at 2:47 am

    Teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

    As for the position of teacher among all walks of life, it is admitted that teachers were more appreciated and valued by society in the past than they are nowadays.

    For the absolute standard like salary, the teacher is enjoying a rising status in society than before. To take my father as an example, he has been enrolled in a senior high school as a chemical teacher for more than 30 years. And it is obvious to see that my father’s salary has increased a lot. Apart from the inflation factor, there is almost 100 times increment on salary. I often hear from my father that in old days, the annual salary cannot even afford a bicycle, but now the salary can not only afford bicycles but also cars. Therefore, from the improving salary, it is easily to conclude that teachers are more appreciated.

    Moreover, teachers’ increasing position can be proved by the rising significance of teacher’s day on every September 10th. In old days, there is no formal festival to gratitude the effort devoted by teachers. What is worse, in China, there were even organizations which seriously cracked down on teachers. There were hundreds of thousands of teachers being punished, fined and even killed. However, with the increasing focus on education, many countries put much attention on teachers and are all willing to celebrate the September 9th. There will be songs, dances and various kinds of performances to celebrate the festival and thanks to teacher’s consideration.

    Last but not least, the government’s shedding more light on education can also be viewed as the aspect that teachers are being better appreciated. In United State, the education projects’ expenditures take up a large proportion of GDP, therefore, projects like refreshing class equipment, hire more qualified teachers and open more schools receive continuous support. So, when the education is focused, teachers who offer lessons and educate students will also be inevitably focus. Then the welfare measurements, the treatment and the salary paid can also show significant improvement.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    December 16, 2020 at 4:00 am

     

    Score: 45

    Issues:

    1. About 35% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Most of them are unnecessarily lengthy. Simplify or split them.
    2. About 35% of the sentences are passive; convert them into their active counterparts. In consideration of sentence coherence, the subject of a sentence better echoes the subject, or the object, of the prior sentence. The subject of a passive sentence, however, often fails to do so, which severely damages the logical flow between sentences.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

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