The government and corporation should share all their scientific discoveries with other countries in the world. Please use specific details and examples to support your opinion.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing The government and corporation should share all their scientific discoveries with other countries in the world. Please use specific details and examples to support your opinion.

  • daniel1024
    University: Southwest University of Political Science & Law
    Nationality: Southwest University of Political Science & Law
    January 6, 2020 at 3:01 pm

    The government and corporation should share all their scientific discoveries with other countries in the world. Please use specific details and examples to support your opinion.

    Human history has been evolving out of continuous new scientific discoveries. We have cell phones that make people closely connected and medical breakthroughs that prolong people’s life expectancy. However, some people believe that government should keep scientific discoveries privately. Whatever their reasons are, most of the discoveries are essential to the development of community and should be shared.

    Firstly, sharing great scientific discoveries is the fundamental reason why academic communities can exist. Great inventions are always built upon previous theories and discoveries; nobody can establish a whole new scientific field purely by himself. CPUs is the result of thousands of scientists from all over the world, who have spent years learning preliminary knowledge from engineering, computer science, mathematics and so on. Therefore, if government keep most of those knowledges privately, there would be nothing for researchers to learn from.

    However, I do believe some of the scientific discoveries must be kept privately to motivate individuals or companies to innovate. We must admit that pursuing economic rewards is behind almost every innovation behavior. Thus, if all discoveries are made open to public by the government, some inventors would feel frustrated and probably stop inventing new things for there is no market rewards for their efforts. Steve Jobs would be daunted if the first Apple phone’s key technologies had been immediately imitated by competitors without punishment.

    Therefore, government should take the double responsibilities of protecting the society’s  drives for innovation and democratizing it at the same time. One way to solve this seemingly paradox is to pay lots of money to those important inventions. The money involved could be huge, but the expenditures pale before the potential improvements brought by sharing great discoveries.

    January 13, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    Score: 43.7

    Issues:

    1. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert them to their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems and errors.

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