The government should spend money on railways rather than roads

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing The government should spend money on railways rather than roads

  • LUNG
    University: communication university of china
    Nationality: China
    October 18, 2020 at 5:57 am

    The government should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

    Government in some countries spend large amount of money on roads. I completely agree with the idea that these are a waste of money, and that the funds should be allocated to railways.

    There are several reasons why the road programmes should be abandoned. Firstly, road construction will occupy more city’s area, and this will make some local pcople lose their space for activities. Secondly, spending money on the road programmes means to encourage people to drive a car. But driving a car is more dangerous than many types of transportation. For example, there are many accidents caused by tired driver and drunk drivers every year. And some data show that other transportation’s type like high-speed trains or planes cause lower accidents’rate than cars. Finally, more efforts in road construction will lead to inscreaed automobile exhaust emissions, thus polluting our envionment.

    I believe that the money from constructing roads should go to vital railways instead. Well-designed railway systems are comfortable and convenient for people to go anywhere in anytime. For example, when families go out together by train, there is no need to drive a car in turn. Instead, family members can enjoy the scenery throught the windows on trains. Furthermore, railway trips cost less money than road trips, and these saved money maybe can use for eating more delicious foods or upgrading a better hotel room. In the end, railway construction will reduce cars’number in city, this will naturally improve our air quality·

    In conclusion, my view is that governments should spend money on railways that benefit our environment and members of society, and it is wrong to waste resources on road projects that reduce city’s area and damage our environment.

    October 19, 2020 at 4:34 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    2. Article errors
    3. Plural versus singular errors
    4. Spelling errors

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.