Which of the following do you think is the most important factor for a student to succeed at college or university? 1- Tutors in the university; 2-The encouragement from family and friends; 3-High-quality education from high school.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Which of the following do you think is the most important factor for a student to succeed at college or university? 1- Tutors in the university; 2-The encouragement from family and friends; 3-High-quality education from high school.

  • SSSSSSSS
    University: The capital normal university
    Nationality: China
    March 26, 2020 at 3:05 pm

    Which of the following do you think is the most important factor for a student to succeed at college or university? 1- Tutors in the university; 2-The encouragement from family and friends; 3-High-quality education from high school.

    When it comes to the most significant key for children to perform well at university, some people believe that college teachers are most important. Others claim that the inspire from parents or close friends are most vital. There is probably some truth in both arguments, but I firmly think that a high standard education from high school plays a key role in one’s college success.

    Initially, the reason why good-quality education from high school is significant is that children’s brains develop fastest when they are juveniles so if they can receive an excellent guide from high school, they are more likely to cast a positive and profound influence on the rest of their lifetime, let alone their college years. To be specific, a creative mind caused by a wise education may result in flexible thinking and then get good grades in one’s major area. Take myself as an example. I was so rigid that I always solve problems in a single way. However, my high school valued innovative education extremely important. With such education, I was encouraged to figure out problems in varied ways and my teachers always told me to break the rules. Thanks to this sensible education, my mind became more and more flexible. When I entered university, I majored in electricity information engineering, and my department often held experimental design competitions. With the training of innovative thinking in my high school, I always took an active part in those competitions and got good grades.

    In addition, there are some limitations between other two options. Admittedly, university tutors and the inspire from close person can help students. To illustrate, students are influenced mostly by their teachers when they are in campus. Also, with the supports from loved one, they could be motivated work hard. However, in comparison to good education from high school, teachers in college and the inspire from close person enjoy less popularity among the general public. To be more specific, the quality of tutors in university are varied.  Also, parents and friend could not company with students all the time.

     

    March 29, 2020 at 1:22 am

    Score: 60.1

    Issues:

    1. About 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. lengthy paragraphs. Restrict each paragraph to 80 words.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    SSSSSSSS
    University: The capital normal university
    Nationality: China
    March 29, 2020 at 4:36 am

    When it comes to the most significant key for children to perform well at university, some people believe that college teachers are most important. Others claim that inspire from parents or close friends are most vital. There is probably some truth in both arguments, but I firmly think that a high level education from high school plays a important role in one’s college success.

    Initially, it’s important for chiledren to receive good-quality education from high school because children’s brains develop fastest when they are juveniles. So, if they can receive an excellent guide at this time, they are more likely to make a profound influence on the rest of their lifetime, let alone their college years. To be specific, a creative mind caused by a wise education may result in creative thinking and then get good grades in one’s professional area. Take myselfness as an example. I was so rigid that I always use a single way to solve problems. However, my high school valued innovative education extremely important. With such guide, I was encouraged to figure out problems with varied methods and my teachers always told me to break the rules. Thanks to this sensible education, my mind became more and more flexible. When I entered university, I majored in electricity information engineering, and my department often held experimental design competitions. With the training of innovative thinking in high school, I always took an active part in those competitions and got good grades.

    Besides, there are some limitations between the other two options. Admittedly, university tutors and inspire from person can help students. Students are influenced mostly by their teachers when they are on campus. Also, with supports from family and friends, they could be motivated to work hard. However, in comparison to good education from high school, teachers in college and inspire from others enjoy less popularity among the general public. To be more specific, the quality of tutors in school are varied. Also, parents and friends could not company with students all the time.

    March 31, 2020 at 1:42 am

    Score: Ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
    3. Restrict each paragraph to 80 words.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    SSSSSSSS
    University: The capital normal university
    Nationality: China
    April 1, 2020 at 10:17 am

    When it comes to the most significant key for children to perform well at university, some people believe that college teachers are most important. Others claim that inspiration from parents or close friends is most vital. There is probably some truth in both arguments. However, I firmly think that a high-level education from high school plays a crucial role.

    Firstly, high schools should provide a good-quality education for children because juveniles’ brains develop fastest at this period. There’s no doubt that an excellent guide is more likely to make a profound influence on the rest of children’s lifetime, let alone their college years. To illustrate further, open minds caused by a wise education may result in creative thinking and then good grades in one’s professional area. Take my own example. I was so rigid that I always use a single way to solve problems. However, my high school valued innovative education quite important. With the direction, I was encouraged to figure out puzzles with varied methods. Thanks to this sensible education, my mind became sharper. When I entered university, I majored in electricity information engineering, and my department often held a variety of competitions. With the training of creative thinking in high school, I always took an active part in those contests and got good grades.

    Besides, there are some limitations of the other two options. Admittedly, university tutors and encouragements from family and friends can help youth. Students are influenced mostly by their teachers when they are on campus. Also, supports from loved ones could motivate young people to work hard. However, in comparison to good education from high school, the other two options, more or less, have some demerits. To be more specific, the quality of tutors in school are varied.  Also, parents and friends could not company with students all the time.

    All in all, it’s a wise decision for the government to fund for professional courses.

    April 9, 2020 at 2:30 am

    Score: 64.6

    Issues:

    1. Lengthy paragraph. Restrict each paragraph to 80 words.

    When it comes to the most [significant key][ redundant ] [ bad word/bad expression/choose a word whose original meaning makes sense here ] for children to perform well at university, some people believe that college teachers are most important[ wordy ] . Others claim that (inspiration from parents) [ wordy ] or close friends is most[ repetition with important/significant ] vital. There is probably some truth in both arguments. However, I firmly think that a (high-level education)[confusing  ] from high school plays a crucial role.

    Firstly, high schools should provide a good-quality education for children because juveniles’ brains develop fastest at[ wrong preposition ] this period. There’s no doubt that an excellent guide[ wrong word ] is more likely to (make a profound influence on)[wordy  ] the rest of children’s lifetime, let alone their college years. To illustrate further, open minds caused by [confusing  ] a wise[wrong word  ] education may result in creative thinking and then good grades in one’s professional[  wrong word] area. Take my own example[ wrong phrase ] . I was so rigid that I always use[tense error  ] a single way to solve problems. However, my high school valued innovative education (quite important)[ redundant ] . With the direction[unclear  ] , I was encouraged to figure out puzzles with varied methods. Thanks to this sensible education, my mind became sharper. When I entered university, I majored in (electricity information engineering)[ spelling error ] , and my department often held a variety of competitions. With the training[wrong word  ] of creative thinking in high school, I always took an active part in those contests and got[ informal word ] good grades.

    Besides, (there are)[avoid using THERE BE to improve sentence clarity  ] some limitations of the other two options[ unclear ] . Admittedly, university tutors[ wrong word ] and encouragements[  word form error] from family and friends can help youth. Students are influenced [passive sentence  ] mostly by their teachers when they are on campus. Also, supports from loved ones could motivate young people to work hard. However, in comparison to good education from high school, the other two options, more or less, have some demerits. To be more specific, the quality of tutors[ incorrect word ] in school are[ grammatical error ] varied[ use a concrete verb to replace BE verb/check Writing Tips] .  Also, parents and friends could not company with students all the time.

    All in all, it’s [informal  ] a wise decision for the government to fund for [ preposition error ] professional courses.