The most important goal of education is to teach people how to educate themselves.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing The most important goal of education is to teach people how to educate themselves.

  • ccyymm_1234
    University: Tongji
    Nationality: China
    October 20, 2019 at 1:42 pm

    TOEFL Writing Topic: The most important goal of education is to teach people how to educate themselves.

    Admittedly, education holds the key for people to teach themselves. It is undeniable that in kindergarten and primary school, we are able to enjoy the careful guidance of our teachers. However, after we enter college, the way we learn shifts, which requires us to boost our critical thinking ability and put into efforts to find out answers to the questions independently since professors will not instruct us the same way as primary school teachers does. The requirement of self-learning becomes even higher when we enter the society. Without any instructors, what we can do is to figure out all sorts of things on our own. Indeed, the ability to educate oneself is a important skills education bring us. Still, from the aspects of personal and national motivatio, self-learing can hardly be defined as the most important goal of education.

    In the first place, for most of people, their primary purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career, which means the most important goal of education for them is to help obtain self-achievement. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate program, he continued to apply for a master degree in medicine. The incentive of his appliance is his dream of being a surgeon; thus he was encouraged to equip himself with advanced knowledge to be a doctor through further education. Likewise, most people receive education not because they hope to learn to educate themselves but they look forward to grasp knowledge in certain field to make preparation for their future development.

    Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the predominant goal of education is, of course, to advance national development which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program making it a necessity for children under 15 years old to receive education. The program turned out to be successful and help cultivate experts from all fields of major who devote themselves to the rapid advancement of China. Therefore education is an indispensable approach to cultivate intellects for the national development.

    October 22, 2019 at 3:03 am

    TOEFL Writing Topic: The most important goal of education is to teach people how to educate themselves.

    Score: 49.3

    Issues:

    1. Many sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten or simplify them.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate the problems/errors concerning this essay.

    Regards,

    Lin Qiu

    ccyymm_1234
    University: Tongji
    Nationality: China
    October 22, 2019 at 9:52 am

    Admittedly, education holds the key for people to teach themselves. In kindergarten and primary school, it is undeniable that we can enjoy the careful guidance of our teachers. After we enter college, however, the way we learn shifts. Since professors will not instruct us the way as primary school teachers do, we are required to boost our critical thinking ability and find answers to the questions independently. The requirement of self-learning becomes even higher when we enter society. Without any instructors, what we can do is to figure out all sorts of things on our own. Indeed, the ability to educate oneself is a vital skill education brings us. Still, from the aspects of personal and national motivation, self-learning can hardly be defined as the most significant goal of education.

    In the first place, people’s general purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career. This means that the most important goal of education for the ordinary is to help obtain self-achievement. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate program, he continued to apply for a master’s degree in medicine. The incentive of his appliance is his dream of being a surgeon; thus, he was encouraged to equip himself with advanced knowledge to be a doctor through further study. Likewise, most people receive an education mainly to grasp knowledge in specific realms rather than learning to educate themselves.

    Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the primary goal of education is, of course, to advance national development, which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program, making it a necessity for children under 15 years old to receive an education. The program turned out to be successful and help cultivate experts who devote themselves to the rapid advancement of China from all fields of major. Therefore, schooling is an indispensable approach to train intellects for national advancement.

    October 22, 2019 at 9:37 pm

    Score: 51.7

    [Study TOEFL and IELTS writing tips to improve your writing. ]

    Admittedly, education holds the key for people to teach themselves. In kindergarten and primary school, it is undeniable that we can enjoy the careful guidance of [preposition error  ] our teachers. After we enter college, however, the way we learn shifts. Since professors will[  tense error] not instruct us the way as primary school teachers do, we are required to boost our critical thinking ability and find answers to the questions independently. The requirement of self-learning becomes even higher when we enter society. Without any instructors, what we can do is to figure out all sorts of things on our own. Indeed, the ability to educate oneself is a vital skill that education brings [ preposition error ]us. Still, from the aspects of personal and national motivation, self-learning can hardly be defined as the most significant goal of education.

    In the first place, people’s general purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career[noun form error  ]. This means that the most important goal of education for the ordinary is to help obtain self-achievement. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate program, he continued to apply for a master’s degree studies in medicine. The incentive of his appliance [wrong word  ]is his dream of being[using concrete Verb instead of BE verb  ] a surgeon; thus, he was encouraged to equip himself with develop advanced knowledge to be[ use concrete verb ] a doctor through further study. Likewise, most people receive an education mainly to grasp knowledge in specific realms rather than learning[ not parallel ] to educate themselves.

    Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the primary goal of education is, of course, to advance national development, which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program, making it a necessity for children under 15 years old to receive an education. The program turned out to be successful and help[tense error  ] cultivate experts who devote [ tense error ]themselves to the rapid advancement of China from all fields of major. Therefore, schooling is an indispensable approach to train intellects for national advancement.

    ccyymm_1234
    University: Tongji
    Nationality: China
    October 26, 2019 at 3:52 am

    <p style=”background: white; margin: 0cm 0cm 12.0pt 0cm;”><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: #45494d;”>Admittedly, education holds the key for people to teach themselves. In kindergarten and primary school, it is undeniable that we can enjoy the careful guidance from <span style=”box-sizing: border-box;”>our teachers. After we enter college, however, the way we learn shifts. Since professors do not instruct us the way as primary school teachers do, we are required to boost our critical thinking ability and find answers to the questions independently. The requirement of self-learning becomes even higher when we enter society. Without any instructors, what we can do is to figure out all sorts of things on our own. Indeed, the ability to educate oneself is a vital skill </span><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: red;”><span style=”box-sizing: border-box;”>that</span></span> education brings <span style=”box-sizing: border-box;”>to</span> us. Still, from the aspects of personal and national motivation, self-learning can hardly be defined as the most significant goal of education.</span></p>
    <p style=”background: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial; word-spacing: 0px; margin: 0cm 0cm 12.0pt 0cm;”><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: #45494d;”>In the first place, people’s general purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career</span><span style=”box-sizing: border-box;”><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: red;”>s</span><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: #45494d;”>. This means that the most important goal of education for the ordinary is to help obtain self-achievement. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate program, he continued to apply for master’s degree </span><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: red;”>studies</span><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: #45494d;”> in medicine. The incentive of his application is his dream of becoming a surgeon; thus, he was encouraged to <span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: red;”>develop</span></span><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: #45494d;”> advanced knowledge to work as a doctor through further study. Likewise, most people receive an education mainly to grasp knowledge in specific realms rather than mastering the skills to educate themselves.</span></span></p>
    <p style=”margin: 0cm; margin-bottom: .0001pt; background: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial; word-spacing: 0px;”><span lang=”EN-US” style=”font-family: ‘Helvetica’,sans-serif; color: #45494d;”>Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the primary goal of education is, of course, to advance national development, which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program, making it a necessity for children under 15 years old to receive an education. The program turned out to be successful and help<span style=”box-sizing: border-box;”>ed</span> cultivate experts who devoted <span style=”box-sizing: border-box;”>themselves to the rapid advancement of China from all fields. Therefore, schooling is an indispensable approach to train intellects for national advancement.</span></span></p>

    October 26, 2019 at 9:58 pm

    Hi, your essay contains lots of unreadable codes. Please choose “Visual”, not the “Text”, to reupload your essay.

    Thanks!

    ccyymm_1234
    University: Tongji
    Nationality: China
    October 31, 2019 at 2:02 am

    Admittedly, education holds the key for people to teach themselves. In kindergarten and primary school, it is undeniable that we can enjoy the careful guidance from our teachers. After we enter college, however, the way we learn shifts. Since professors do not instruct us the way as primary school teachers do, we are required to boost our critical thinking ability and find answers to the questions independently. The requirement of self-learning becomes even higher when we enter society. Without any instructor, what we can do is to figure out all sorts of things on our own. Indeed, the ability to educate oneself is a vital skill. Still, from the aspects of personal and national motivation, self-learning can hardly be defined as the most significant goal of education.

    In the first place, people’s general purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career. This means that the most important goal of education for the ordinary is to help obtain self-achievement. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate program, he continued to apply for master’s degree studies in medicine. The incentive of his application is his dream of becoming a surgeon; thus, he was encouraged to develop advanced knowledge to work as a doctor through further study. Likewise, most people receive an education mainly to grasp knowledge in specific realms rather than mastering the skills to educate themselves.

    Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the primary goal of education is, of course, to advance national development, which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program, making it a necessity for children under 15 years old to receive an education. The program turned out to be successful and helped cultivate experts who devoted to the rapid advancement of China from all fields. Therefore, schooling is an indispensable approach to train intellects for national development.

    October 31, 2019 at 8:05 pm

    Score: 51.3

    You must shorten/split sentences exceeding 20 words.

    Studying Writing Tips.

    Admittedly, education holds the key for people to teach themselves [ hard to understand ]. In kindergarten and primary school, it is undeniable that [ redundant/factual error ]we can enjoy the [  article error ]careful guidance from our teachers. After we enter college, however, the way we learn shifts. Since professors do not instruct us the way as primary school teachers do, we are required to boost our critical thinking ability and by finding answers to the questions independently. The requirement of [ wrong preposition ]self-learning becomes even higher when we enter society. Without any instructor, what we can do is [redundant/we need  ]to figure out all [ absolute writing ]sorts of things on our own. [ lack connection with the prior sentence ]Indeed, the ability to educate oneself is a vital skill. Still, from the aspects of personal and national motivation[ unclear ], self-learning can hardly be defined as the most significant goal of education.

    In the first place, people’s general purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career[factual error  ]. This means that the most important goal of education for the ordinary is to help [ logical incompleteness ]obtain self-achievement. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate program[ wrong word/studies ], he continued to apply for master’s degree studies in medicine Medicine. The incentive of his application is his dream of becoming[  redundant] in order to become a surgeon; thus, he was encouraged [ passive  ] to develop advanced knowledge to work as a doctor through further study. Likewise, most people receive an education mainly to grasp knowledge in specific realms rather than mastering the skills to educate themselves.

    Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the primary goal of education is, of course, [ redundant  ]to advance[ facilitate  ] national development, which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program, making it a necessity for [  redundant/requiring ]children under 15 years old to receive an education[  repetition ]. The program turned out to be [ redundant/proved  ]successful and helped cultivate experts who devoted themselves to the rapid advancement of China from[ wrong preposition  ] all fields. Therefore, schooling is an indispensable approach to train intellects for national development.

    ccyymm_1234
    University: Tongji
    Nationality: China
    November 3, 2019 at 9:19 am

    Admittedly, education is helpful for people to teach themselves. In kindergarten and primary school, we can enjoy careful guidance from our teachers. After we enter college, however, the way we learn shifts. Since professors do not instruct us the way as primary school teachers do, we are required to boost our critical thinking ability by finding answers to the questions independently. The requirement for self-learning becomes even higher when we enter society. Without any instructor, we need to figure out almost all sorts of things on our own. From this aspect, the ability to educate oneself and to adapt to the changing environment, which education can bring to us, is of great significance. Consequently, to enhance people’s self-learning ability may be one of the benefits of education. Despite of this, self-education can hardly be defined as the most significant goal of education in terms of people’s motivation to obtain an education.

    In the first place, it is not uncommon that people’s purpose of receiving an education is to lay a solid foundation for their future career. This means that the most important goal of education for them is to learn the essential knowledge for their future development. My cousin is a good case in point. After completing his undergraduate studies, he continued to apply for master’s degree studies in Medicine in order to become a surgeon; thus, he was encouraged to develop advanced knowledge to work as a doctor through further study. Likewise, most people receive an education mainly to grasp knowledge in specific realms rather than mastering the skills to educate themselves.

    Moreover, from the standpoint of government, the primary goal of education is to facilitate national development, which relies on the contribution of erudite people. Years ago, China started the 9-year compulsory education program, requiring children under 15 years old to attend school. The project proved successful and helped cultivate experts who devoted themselves to the rapid advancement of China in all fields. Therefore, schooling is an indispensable approach to train intellects for national development.

    November 14, 2019 at 3:58 am

    Score: 48.6

    You need to

    1. Restrict each paragraph to 90 words;
    2. Shorten most sentences exceeding 20 words.

    I will not work on your essay until you revise it as noted above.