It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours.

  • TOEFL Victim
    University: Shanghai Maritime University
    Nationality: China
    April 7, 2020 at 7:54 am

    It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours.

    It is argued for a long time whether people should work more days for less time or not. From my standpoint, working five days a week for shorter hours is much more enjoyable. I hold the view for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

    To begin with, working five days for shorter hours can effectively spread the pressure of assignments. Encountering heavy work is inevitable for employees and they may suffer from great pressure if deadline is shortened to three days. Most of the pressure drives people feel overwhelming is caused by the closing deadline and five days’ working is able to distribute works to different days so that people can arrange work by themselves. It is known to us that Japan has the highest suicide rate over the wold, continuously heavy work and deadlines one after another may account for the phenomenon somewhat.

    Furthermore, five days’ working means more available times for employees to think about the best way to solving problems. A lot of people including me have the experience that sophisticated questions are solved naturally after resting. Psychology interpret this phenomenon as the result of brain’s unconsciously working. Anyway, what we can infer is that it is much more efficient to spend spared time on the problem than continuously working whole day and the enjoyment people get after completing a hard job will in turn influence their moods in a good way.

    Given the aforesaid analysis , I can draw the conclusion that working five days a week is more suitable and feasible for people. People can avoid being bothered by the pressure that deadline brings and they will be more likely to deal with difficult problems in perfect way.

    April 8, 2020 at 1:29 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 50% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 50% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    TOEFL Victim
    University: Shanghai Maritime University
    Nationality: China
    April 8, 2020 at 2:13 am

    It is argued for a long time whether people should work more days for less time or not. From my standpoint, working five days a week for shorter hours is much more enjoyable. I hold the view for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

    To begin with, working five days for shorter hours helps spread the pressure of assignments. Longer working hours mean employees need to face several urgent issues at a moment notice. Intense work contributes to pressure which will drive people overwhelming. As we all know, Japan has the highest suicide rate all over the world. Heavy work and deadlines one after another may account for the phenomenon. To avoid severe consequence, much can be done. People can arrange their schedule by working more days for shorter hours since more working days give freedom to divide heavy task.

    Furthermore, five days’ working can provide enough time for employees to solve problems. A lot of people including me have the experience that sophisticated questions are solved naturally after resting. Psychologists interpret this phenomenon as the result of brain’s unconsciously working. Anyway, we can infer from it that spending fragmented time on solving problem is more efficient than continuously working all day. The enjoyment people get after completing a hard job will in turn improve their moods.

    In conclusion, working five days a week is more suitable for people. Perfect way to relieve pressure and deal with difficult issues.

    TOEFL Victim
    University: Shanghai Maritime University
    Nationality: China
    April 8, 2020 at 2:46 am

    It is argued for a long time whether people should work more days for less time or not. From my standpoint, working five days a week for shorter hours is much more enjoyable. I hold the view for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

    To begin with, working five days for shorter hours helps spread the pressure of assignments. Longer working hours mean employees need to face several urgent issues at a moment notice. Intense work contributes to pressure which will drive people overwhelming. As we all know, Japan has the highest suicide rate all over the world. Heavy work and deadlines one after another may account for the phenomenon. To avoid severe consequence, much can be done. People can arrange their schedule by working more days since it can give freedom to divide heavy task.

    Furthermore, five days’ working can provide enough time for employees to solve problems. A lot of people have the same experience that sophisticated questions are answered naturally after resting. Psychologists interpret this phenomenon as the result of brain working unconsciously. Anyway, we can infer from it that spending fragmented time on solving problem is more efficient than continuously working all day. The enjoyment people get after completing a hard job will improve their moods.

    In conclusion, working five days a week is more suitable for people. Perfect way to relieve pressure and deal with difficult issues.