A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do you think this person would like and dislike about living in your town or city? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay. (Full Score)

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing Samples (all perfect score) A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do you think this person would like and dislike about living in your town or city? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay. (Full Score)

  • October 6, 2019 at 12:34 am

    TOEFL Writing Sample: A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do you think this person would like and dislike about living in your town or city? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay.

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    As a Chinese citizen, I now live in a small town in the center of Morocco. It is called Azrou and it is a very ancient place. I would like visitors and anyone planning to live in my city to know about its history, its location and the places of interest.

    Not far from Azrou is Ifrane, which has a world-famous university. Believe it or not, the language of instruction at this university is English, so it is a good place for foreign people to visit. It is also very beautiful in this area because it is very close to the Atlas Mountains. One of the Americans who visited last year said that the scenery reminded her of California. There are very tall pine forests and it is definitely one of the best places to visit in central Morocco.

    The local market in town sells many things, but the specialty is local hand drums called dumbeks. There is also a museum in my town that presents the life and artifacts of the local Berber tribes who have lived in North Africa since before history began.

    For many people, Azrou is simply a point of interest located near the big city of Fez. This is the oldest city in the region and it is an amazing place to walk around because all of the city streets are too small for cars. They have old stones for pavement even in the downtown area. There are hundreds of famous religious shrines.

    Azrou is also a good place to meet other tourists. France colonized Morocco a few centuries ago and so most local people speak Arabic and also a little French. There are many excellent French and Berber restaurants and this is also something that tourists will want to know about.

    [294 words]


    Notes:

    1. All of the prompts are from former TOEFL exams.
    2. The information available online, i.e., Google search results, is either misleading or wrong relative to length: [an organization] states independent essays should be between 280-320 words. More words than needed is equivalent to more opportunities to make a mistake. Students should be informed re: word count, i.e., MORE WORDS does not mean a higher score.
    3. Information concerning paragraphs/content available from [a TOEFL training school], etc. is also wrong: the number of paragraphs is irrelevant and the only important issue re: content is to RESPOND DIRECTLY to the prompt, i.e., the raters/software doesn’t care about structure or content except the latter must Make sense and Must directly respond to the prompt [to preclude prepared essays].
    4. UK usage/spelling is entirely acceptable.
    5. AVOID complex grammar; avoid ‘Chinese English’ usage; 5 tenses: present, past, future, present perfect [have done/has been], and conditional [would go/could do it] are OPTIMAL.
    6. Don’t rewrite the prompt in the first paragraph of your essay…it’s okay to paraphrase [use words that mean the same thing].
    7. Recent TOEFL change…students found test takes too long, so there are fewer multiple-choice questions, i.e., essays are now more heavily ‘weighted’]