At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

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Paying more attention to sports and social activities at universities and colleges has gradually become a trend nowadays, especially in the background[ /principle ] of cultivating more comprehensive students for society. However, although very significant, sports and social activities should not receive equal financial support as classes and libraries [should  ].

Firstly, students pay high to study here, mainly. A large number of students are not rich enough to afford the[ higher ] tuition [fees  ] or suffer heavy financial pressure during college life. Their primary purpose in attending[ attaining/receiving ] college education is to arm themselves with specific skills so that they will get a high-paid job, [punctuation error  ]most of which could not be obtained without a degree certificate[ lengthy sentence; split into two ]. Thus, the money collected from those students (definitely should be largely)[use adverbs only when necessary  ] used for the facilities related to their major study. As for sports and social activities, students who have extra interests could pay by themselves instead of spending public money.

Second, the increasing economy requires more workers specialized in engineers, computer sciences, medical health, finance, etc. Those positions do not ask for people to have sports talent or social techniques. From this perspective, investing money into classes and libraries could directly contribute to the whole economy and meet market needs. Although sports and entertainment are also parts of the economy, their share is much less than the rest, which includes most of the majors in the university.

Moreover, money is a rare resource, and efficiency is crucial in modern society. Every university will consider the students’ employment rate, which plays an important role in evaluating its ranks. So how to spend limited money more effectively must be taken into consideration. For instance, building a new stadium will cost a lot of money but may bring very few profits after its construction. While replacing the devices in the classrooms will improve the teaching condition immediately, which might lead to higher education quality so that benefit the whole university greatly.

In conclusion, more money should be spent on classes and libraries instead of on sports and social activities.

Final revision.

• Most sentences are logically disconnected. Coherence would improve when you try to echo the subject of a sentence to the subject, or the object, of the preceding sentence.
• Most passive sentences should be changed to active ones.