Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries.

  • jasminewhoxx
    University: 中国传媒
    Nationality: China
    July 22, 2020 at 1:45 pm

    Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes of this problem and suggest some possible solutions.

    It is true that the number of overweight children is increasing in different parts of the world. There are a variety of possible reasons for this, but steps can definitely be taken to tackle the problems.

    In my opinion, there are the three main factors are to blame for the obesity Problem of children, Firstly, they have a bad eating habit. Shacking around the clock is a vicious habit many are guilty of. Eating at night is almost never a good idea. Secondly,unhealthy lifestyle influenced by parents could be the most important reason. It includes not only lack of exercise, but also a messed up rest schedule. Their rate of metabolism may slow down after Staying up late at night children are too exhausted to get regular physical activities. Finally low on confidence. There is a high chance that overweight children may get body-shamed by other children just because of their appearance. It could be too Stressful to handle all this at a young age, which could lead to emotional eating.

    Those problems above can be certainly improved. I believe that the change must start with the parents. They should act as role model to Cultivate their children develop good habits. The first step is to keep regular hours and help the body clock adapt to a normal routine. For example, pick a bed time and wake-up time and stick to them as much as possible. At the Same time, these masseurs Should be Supported by  regular aerobic exercise like running and cycling. It is very effective at burning calories and Strengthening children’s bones. Moreover, the best way to control weight is to stick to reasonable diet,eat healthier and refuse greasy food. It is parents’ responsibility to control what their Children eat. Vegetable and fruits are essential to healthy diet. In addition, the help of a mental health professional might be needed for overweight children.

    In conclusion, there are multiple factors that causing obesity among children and possible solutions exist to improve this bad situation.

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    July 23, 2020 at 9:11 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. Include the main problems in introduction;
    2. Article errors;
    3. Capitalization errors;
    4. Lengthy paragraphs; restrict each paragraph to 90 words;
    5. Lengthy essay (The optimal length of TOEFL essay is 300 – 320 words.)
    6. About 20% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    jasminewhoxx
    University: 中国传媒
    Nationality: China
    July 24, 2020 at 4:51 am

    It is true that the number of overweight children is growing at an alarming rate. There are a variety of possible reasons for this, but steps can be taken to tackle the problems.

    In my opinion, three main factors are to blame for the obesity problem of children. Firstly, they have a unhealthy eating habit. Snacking around-the-clock is a vicious habit many are guilty of. Eating at night is definitely not a good idea. Secondly,unhealthy lifestyle influenced by parents could be the most important reason. It includes not only a lack of exercise, but also a messed-up rest schedule. Their rate of metabolism may slow down after staying up late at night, children are too exhausted to get regular physical activities. Finally,low on confidence. There is a high chance that overweight children may get body-shamed by other children because of their appearance. It could be too stressful to handle all this at a young age, which could lead to emotional eating.

    Those problems above can certainly be improved. I believe that the change must start with the parents. They should act as role models to cultivate their children to develop good habits. The first step is to keep regular hours and help the body clock adapt to a fixed routine. For example, pick a bed time and wake-up time and stick to them as much as possible. At the same time, these masseurs should be supported by  regular aerobic exercise like running and cycling. It is very effective at burning calories and strengthening children’s bones. Moreover, the best way to control weight is to stick to a reasonable diet,eat healthier and refuse greasy food. It is parents’ responsibility to control what their children eat. Vegetable and fruit are essential to a healthy diet. In addition, the help of a mental health professional might be needed for overweight children.

    In conclusion, there are multiple factors causing obesity among children and possible solutions exist to improve this poor situation.

     

    Administrator
    University: University of Wisconsin
    July 24, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    Invalid [ you need to complete the revision of your other essay prior to submitting this one.]