Children aged 12-16 are taught different subjects by different teachers
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July 6, 2019 at 5:31 am
Essay Topic: Children aged 12-16 are taught different subjects by different teachers.
Although nowadays younger children are taught by one teacher all day, there may have better ways to teach them. For example, their approach to different teachers may encourage them to study. I think younger children benefit from being taught by different teachers rather than are badly affected by different teachers.
For one thing, different teaching methods can inspire their interests. For example, if a teacher likes to make students do the topic at class and only tells them why the correct answer being a certain one, it would be boring. Especially this teacher unfortunately teach certain younger children all day long, that’s a boring day when I don’t want to spend my time at all. For another, suppose that a teacher is strict to younger children, the one who made mistakes would have classes with his or her teacher all day long, he or her may feel so scared that the child can’t pay attention to the knowledge. The child may also have a bad mood until he or her leaves school.
However, some people believe that one teacher teaches younger children all day can not only save human resources but also better respond to the needs of different children. Different teachers teach classes for a certain class will increase the workload of teachers because they have to schedule the timetable and prepare different contents for different classes. But if they teach for a whole day in one class, the drawback referred to above is diminished. Also if a teacher gets along with a group of kids everyday, he or she will know much about different children’s characteristics so that he or she could better meet children’s needs. This will benefit children’s growing.
I personally believe that younger children should be taught different subjects by different teachers. A teacher who mainly help students learn a certain subject could also pay attention to their different needs. What’s more, it seems that wasting human resources is a superficial phenomenon. Teachers also need new scene to change their moods. By making younger children able to approach different teachers, they will learn with better moods and greater interests.
In conclusion, younger children can benefit from being taught by different teachers every day, they will study with good moods and greater interests. The benefits overshadow its considered drawbacks.
July 6, 2019 at 9:12 pmScore: 65.6
Suggestions for Improvement
- Convert passive sentences into their active counterparts;
- Shorten/split sentences exceeding 20 words;
- Shorten your essay to 320 words.
Problems Highlight
Although nowadays younger children are taught by[passive] one teacher all day[factual error/absolute expression], there may have better ways to teach them.[grammatical error] For example, their approach[vague] to different teachers may encourage them to study. I think younger children benefit from being taught by [passive]different teachers rather than are [unparalleled writing] badly affected by different teachers.[Verbose]
For one thing, different teaching methods can inspire their[Unclear pronoun] interests. For example, if a teacher likes to make students do the topic at class and only tells them why the correct answer being a certain one, it would be boring[grammatical error in subjunctive voice]. Especially[Problematic Verb] this teacher unfortunately [problematic adverb]teach [grammatical error]certain younger children all day long, that’s [conventions error] a boring day when I don’t [conventions error]want to spend my time at all. For another, suppose that a teacher is strict to younger children, the one [unclear pronoun]who made mistakes would have classes with his or her teacher all day long, he or her [grammatical error]may feel so scared that the child can’t [conventions error]pay attention to the[article error] knowledge. [Verbose]The child may also have a bad mood until he or her [grammatical error] leaves school.
However, some people believe that one teacher teaches younger children all day can not only save human resources but also better respond to the needs of different children.[Verbose] Different teachers teach classes for a certain class will increase the workload of teachers because they have to schedule the timetable and prepare different contents for different classes. [Verbose]But if they teach for a whole day in one class, the drawback referred to above is diminished.[passive] Also if a teacher gets along with a group of kids everyday,[Spelling error] he or she will know much about different children’s characteristics so that he or she could better meet children’s needs. [Verbose]This will benefit children’s growing.
I personally[unnecessary/problematic adverb] believe that younger children should be taught [passive]different subjects by different teachers. [Verbose]A teacher who mainly help [grammatical error]students learn a certain[Repetition] subject could also pay attention to their different needs. What’s more, it seems that wasting human resources is a superficial phenomenon. Teachers also need [article error]new scene to change their moods. By making younger children able to approach different teachers, they will learn with better moods and greater interests.[Verbose]
In conclusion, younger children can benefit from being taught by [passive]different teachers every day, [punctuation error]they will study with good moods and greater interests. [Verbose]The benefits overshadow its considered drawbacks.
Comment: There are more errors than those highlighted ones. Please revise and resubmit your essay for further assessment and revision. Regards.
