Full-time university students today spend a lot of time studying, but someone thinks it is essential for them to be involved in other activities too. 

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Full-time university students today spend a lot of time studying, but someone thinks it is essential for them to be involved in other activities too. 

  • ArimaKisho
    University: ECJTU
    Nationality: China
    November 9, 2021 at 12:39 pm

    Full-time university students today spend a lot of time studying, but someone thinks it is essential for them to be involved in other activities too. 

    Recent years have witnessed university students’ time management, which has aroused a heated debate of whether students should focus time on major study or other activities. I’m in favor of the latter view.

    Convincing arguments can be made that major plays a significant role in students’ college, and it’s reasonable for them to spend time, subsequently bringing a lot of benefits. To begin with, the fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, the four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, taking part in other activities has always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to relax, with the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have been cultivated, such as the ability of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Specifically, it can hardly be denied that a combination of both professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for the career and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, it seems to me that students are supposed to take part in after-class activities which give them more clear advantages.

    November 9, 2021 at 4:22 pm

    Recent years have witnessed university students’ time management, which has aroused a heated debate of whether students should focus time on major study or other activities. I’m in favor of the latter view. [Rewrite using your own words  ]

    Convincing arguments can be made that major plays a significant role in students’ college, [Rewrite using your own words  ]and it’s reasonable for them to spend time, subsequently bringing a lot of benefits. To begin with, the fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, the four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, taking part in other activities has always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to relax, with the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have been cultivated, such as the ability of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Specifically, it can hardly be denied that a combination of both professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for the career and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, it seems to me that students are supposed to take part in after-class activities which give them more clear advantages.

    November 9, 2021 at 4:25 pm

    Rewrite your essay. Fix all issues indicated on screenshot reviews.

    ArimaKisho
    University: ECJTU
    Nationality: China
    November 10, 2021 at 4:00 am

    When students enter college, they will face the dilemma of whether to only focus on study or join more activities during the period. And I stand on the side of the latter one.

    Many people argue that a major plays a significant role in students’ college, and it’s reasonable for them to spend time, subsequently bringing a few benefits. The fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, so other activities have always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to release themselves, from the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have cultivated, such as the abilities of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Last but not least, it is undeniable that a combination of professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for their future work and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, I still commit to the notion that after-class activities give them more clear advantages rather than weaknesses.

    November 11, 2021 at 2:09 pm

    When students enter college, they will face the dilemma of whether to only focus on study (their studies) or joining more (delete) activities during the period (delete). And I stand on the side of the latter one (rewrite this sentence and add some reasoning why you agree with this side).

    Many people argue that (your) major plays a significant role in students’ (delete) college, and it’s (do not use conjunctions) reasonable for them to spend time (spend time doing what?), subsequently bringing a few benefits. The fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, so other activities have always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to release themselves, from the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have cultivated, such as the abilities of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Last but not least, it is undeniable that a combination of professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for their future work and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, I still commit to the notion that after-class activities give them more clear advantages rather than weaknesses.

    November 11, 2021 at 2:09 pm

    Partial Revision (please fix similar errors, revise whole essay, and resubmit)

    ArimaKisho
    University: ECJTU
    Nationality: China
    November 12, 2021 at 11:37 am

    When students enter college, they will face the dilemma of whether to only focus on their studies or join activities. After weighing the pros and cons, I choose to support the latter.

    Many people argue that your major plays a significant role in college, being reasonable for them to spend time studying, subsequently bringing a few benefits. The fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, so other activities have always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to release themselves, from the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have cultivated, such as the abilities of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Last but not least, it is undeniable that a combination of professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for their future work and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, I still commit to the notion that after-class activities give them more clear advantages rather than weaknesses.

    November 12, 2021 at 8:09 pm

    When students enter college[ redundant ], they will[ grammatical error ] face the dilemma of whether to only[ redundant word ] focus on their studies or join activities. [After weighing the pros and cons, I choose to support the latter][ use your own words to write ].

    Many people argue that your [informal use in person  ]major plays a significant role in college[ sentence makes no sense ], being reasonable for them to spend time studying, subsequently bringing a few benefits. The fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, so other activities have always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to release themselves, from the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have cultivated, such as the abilities of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Last but not least, it is undeniable that a combination of professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for their future work and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, I still commit to the notion that after-class activities give them more clear advantages rather than weaknesses.

    November 12, 2021 at 8:14 pm

    Revision under suspension [check WeChat feedback]

    ArimaKisho
    University: ECJTU
    Nationality: China
    November 13, 2021 at 10:30 am

    Students will face the dilemma of whether to focus on their studies or joining activities. And I would like to prefer the latter one.

    Many people argue that major is reasonable for them to spend time studying, subsequently bringing a few benefits. The fundamental objective in schools is to learn professional skills and knowledge. If students do not attach importance to it, the tuition is just a waste of parents’ money, four years are meaningless. In addition, the student who gets better grades will have better data on their resume, thus being more competitive than their peers and able to enter good jobs in the future.

    However, I would argue that it is harmful to only focus on study in this day and age, so other activities have always been essential. Consequently, it’s a way for students to release themselves, from the increase of academic pressure. Also, these events can broaden their horizon. More importantly, undergraduates can get an integrated development of which social skills have cultivated, such as the abilities of interpersonal communication, leadership management, and logical thinking. Above all of these can only can be comprehended in activities. In that case, it will enhance their competitiveness during future careers. Last but not least, it is undeniable that a combination of professional skills and practical activities works best, doing more for their future work and contributing to society.

    In conclusion, I still commit to the notion that after-class activities give them more clear advantages rather than weaknesses.