Some people say that government should give priority to health care whereas others say they should spend on other important priorities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Some people say that government should give priority to health care whereas others say they should spend on other important priorities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

  • 1015219599
    University: BeiJing University of Chemical Technology
    Nationality: Chinese
    April 12, 2020 at 1:04 am

    Some people say that government should give priority to health care whereas others say they should spend on other important priorities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

    Some people hold the view that the government should give priority to health care. But I believe that there are more important domains that require the Government’s support.

    There are a range of reasons why the government should give health care first priorities. First of all, highly-developed health care is able to produce a effective guarantee towards people’s health. Since those who catch illness can receive imminent and valid treatment, and it also prohibit the propagation of diseases.

    Besides that, facilitating the development of health care can lead to an economical advancement of the society. Because the improvement of health care will generate an increasing amount of medicine in utilization, leading to bumper benefits. Also, it also impacts the employment rate in a positive way. The development in health care will cause an enormous amount of job vacancy in medical domain.

    However, I believe that there are more crucial areas deserving the government’s priorities. Because I reckon that the development of health care should base on advanced education. I disapprove that the health care will progress in when people in this area fail to possess sufficient empirical knowledge. Meanwhile, to cure some perplexing diseases, like cancer, require cutting-edge technology. Moreover, economy also plays an important role in improving health care. Abundant financial support is the preliminary desire of developing anything.

    In conclusion, a variety of people would like the government to pay the foremost attention to health care, while I believe that the government should give priority to more important areas.

    April 14, 2020 at 3:28 pm

    Score: 51.6

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    1015219599
    University: BeiJing University of Chemical Technology
    Nationality: Chinese
    April 15, 2020 at 12:08 am

    Some people hold the view that the government should give priority to health care. But I believe that the government should pay attention to more vital areas.

    There is a range of reasons why the government should give health care first priorities. First of all, highly-developed health care can guarantee people’s health in an effective way. Since patients are able to receive immediate treatment, as well as imposing a potent prohibition towards the propagation of transmissible virus.

    Besides that, the development of health care can lead to an economic advancement. Because the improvement of health care will generate an increasing demand of medicine, leading to bumper benefits from producing those medicine. Also, it impacts the employment rate in a positive way. The development of health care will produce an enormous job demand in medical domain.

    However, I believe that there are fields in a dire desire towards the government’s concern. Because I reckon that in a regular basis, well-developed health care is based on advanced education. In my opinion, patients are unlikely to get cured without vocational doctors. Meanwhile, to cure some perplexing diseases, like cancer, cutting-edge technology is in a great necessity. Moreover, the development of the economy also plays an important role in improving health care. Abundant financial support is the preliminary desire of developing anything.

    In conclusion, a variety of people approve that the government should give priorities to health care, while I believe that there are some areas demanding the government’s attention in an urgent

    April 15, 2020 at 4:37 am

    Score: 52.2

    Issues:

    1. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    1015219599
    University: BeiJing University of Chemical Technology
    Nationality: Chinese
    April 18, 2020 at 8:46 am

    Some people hold the view that the government should give priorities to health care. But I believe that the government should pay attention to more vital areas.

    There is a range of reasons why the government should give health care first priorities. First of all, highly-developed health care can guarantee people’s health. Because patients are likely to receive immediate treatment as soon as they catch illness. Also, it can prohibit the transmission of virus by operating timely medical remedy.

    Besides that, the development of health care can lead to economic advancement. Because the improvement of health care demands mass production of medicine, which will lead to bumper benefits from producing those medicine. Moreover, it plays a prominent role in increasing the employment rate. The development of health care will create an enormous job demand in the medical domain.

    However, I deem that there are fields in an urgent desire towards the government’s concern. Because I consider advanced education as the bedrock of well-developed health care. From my perspective, patients are unlikely to get cured without vocational doctors. Meanwhile, the cutting-edge technology holds the key to curing perplexing diseases to a great extent. Besides that, the economic power also plays an important role in improving health care. Abundant financial support is the preliminary desire of developing anything.

    To sum up, a variety of people hold the view that the government should give priorities to health care, but I consider that the areas elsewhere are in dire desire towards the government’s first priorities.

    April 21, 2020 at 8:34 pm

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