Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
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July 31, 2020 at 3:59 pm
Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, it is controversial whether the government should spend much more money on the art field than the athletics field. While some would argue that the support of athletics could do much benefits, it is still better if much more money is spent on the arts.
To begin with, those who believe more money should be paid to athletics would argue that this support could make citizens live in a healthier life. The government could spend the money on the construction of more stadiums and the investigation of more sophisticated ways about exercise. This improvement would lead some residents have more chances and better environment to keep health.
However, while the improvement of the sports field could only make a benefit to people’s health, this can only contribute to a certain part of people who are willing to do exercise. The financial support of arts could actually improve the aesthetic level. The money devoted to the art education in school could help students learn more history, the forms and the meanings of art. Therefore, it could generally improve people’s understanding about many art works. For example, nowadays, few people would deny the greatness of Shakespears plays. This is because the improvement of aesthetic level makes most people in the world understand the meaning of his masterpieces and appreciate the sophisticated plots.
Additionally, the financial support of arts could improve the science and techonology world. The promotion of art make it is easier for people to invent. The essence of art is creativity, since all the paintings, structure and staff like that always need the artists to imagine the structure, the combination of colors, as well as the theme. This imgination could effectively improve people’s ability to create, which is critical for people to come up with precedented ideas. Take the climate system as an example, it is the creativity of earth scientists and physicists in 1950s, they have been attempting to model the earth climate on computer. Finally, we have the complex climate system we use today to predict the future climate change.
August 4, 2020 at 3:52 amScore: ungraded
Issues:
- About 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
- About 10% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.
- Lengthy paragraphs. Restrict each paragraph to 90 words.
I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.
August 4, 2020 at 12:46 pmNowadays, it is controversial whether the government should spend much more money on art field than athletics field. While some would argue the support of athletics could do many benefits, it is better if government spends much more money on the arts.
To begin with, those who believe that government needs pay more money to athletics would argue that this support could make citizens live a healthier life. The government could spend the money on the construction of stadiums and the investigation of sophisticated ways about exercise. This improvement would lead some residents to have a better environment to keep healthy.
However, while the improvement of the sports field could make a benefit to people’s health, this can only contribute to a specific part of people who are willing to do exercise. The financial support of arts could improve the aesthetic level. The money devoted to art education in school could help students learn more history, the forms, and the meanings of art. As a result, it could generally improve people’s understanding of many artworks. For example, nowadays, few people would deny the greatness of Shakespear’s plays, because the improvement of aesthetic level makes most people understand the meaning of his masterpieces and appreciate the sophisticated plots.
Additionally, the financial support of arts could improve the science and technology world. The promotion of art makes it is easier for people to invent. The essence of art is creating, since all the paintings, sculptures, and staff like that always need the artists to imagine. For example, the painters always need to imagine the structure, the combination of colors, and the theme. This imagination could effectively improve people’s ability to create, which is critical for people to come up with precedented ideas. Take the climate system as an example. It is the creation of earth scientists and physicists in 1950s that caused them have been attempting to model the earth climate on computers. Finally, we have the complex climate system we use today to predict the future climate change.
August 4, 2020 at 2:12 pmNowadays, it is controversial
whether the[ that ] government should spendmuch more[ substantial amounts of ] money on [ the] art field than [the ] athletics field. While somewouldargue [that ] the supportof[ for ] athletics could do many benefits, it is better if government spends much more money on the arts[repetition/I am of the opinion that state funding for arts can benefit the society in general ] .To begin with,
those who believe that government needs [ to ] pay more money to athletics[ advocates for arts funding] would argue thatthis[the ] support couldmake[ bring ]citizens livea healthier life [to citizens ] .The government could[By spending lavishly ]spend the moneyon the construction of stadiums andthe investigation of sophisticated ways about exercise.[and launching various fitness schemes/programs, ]This improvement would lead some[the government could provide ] residents [ with ]to havea better environment to keep [ /stay ] healthy.However, while[ Despite that ] the improvement ofthesportsfield[ facilities ] couldmake a benefit to[ benefit ] people’s health,this[the proposed policy ]can[could ] onlycontribute to[ benefit ] a specific part[percentage ] of [ sports-minded ] people who are willing to do exercise.The financial support of [for ] arts could improve the aesthetic level.The money devoted to art educationin school[, however, ] could help students learn more [about the ] history, the forms, and the meanings of [ /concerning ]art[ various forms of arts ] . As a result,it[ governmental spending on arts ] couldgenerally[ significantly ] improve people’s understanding of many artworks.For example, nowadays, few people would deny the greatness of Shakespear’s plays, because the improvement of aesthetic level makes most people understand the meaning of his masterpieces and appreciate the sophisticated plots.[ verbose/redundant ]Additionally,
thefinancial supportof[for ] arts could [ also facilitate scientific and technological innovation]improve the science and technology world [by ].The promotion of art makes it is easier for people to invent.The essence of art is creating,sinceall the[many ] paintings, sculptures, andstaff like[architectures involve ]that always need theartists [artists’ wildest imagination ]to imagine.For example, the painters[Painters ]alwaysneed toimagine[ conceive]thestructure,thecombination of colors,and[as well as ] the theme [, requisite for his/her artistic work ] . This imagination could effectively improve people’sability to create[creativeness ] , which is critical for people to come up withprecedented[unprecedented ] ideas. Take the climate system as an example. It is the creationof[by the ]earth[ Earth ] scientists and physicists in [the ] 1950s thatcaused[inpired ] them [ to ]have been attemptingto model theearth[Earth ] climateon[ using ]computers[computer ] .Finally, we have the complex climate system we use today to predict the future climate change.
