Many countries spend large amounts of money on world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead these monies can be spent on encouraging young children to take up sports at a young age.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing Many countries spend large amounts of money on world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead these monies can be spent on encouraging young children to take up sports at a young age.

  • cassieskin
    University: Chongqing University
    Nationality: China
    September 4, 2019 at 2:51 pm

    IELTS Task 2: Many countries spend a lot of money for competitors to take part in major competitions such as the Olympic Games and World Cup. Some people think that it is better to spend money on encouraging children to take part in sports at a young age. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

    A lot of countries spend much money training competitors to improve their performance in the major competitions. While it’s true that the kids should also be encouraged to join in sports, I don’t think the government should cut back the cost on the training.

    The reasons for investing in athletes involve the recognition that countries which don’t pay attention to these athletes are relatively weaker in sports events. By contrast, those who have spent a lot of money on the facilities or equipment that players need are likely to dominate the match. They tend to perform better than their opponents, which gives them more chances to win, as well as gives them an advantage of gaining a medal for their countries.

    However, there are certainly dangers in only focusing on the national players without paying much attention to children’ sports. Children may end up leading a sedentary life and not playing sports when they grow up. They may think that exercising is not necessary for people who are not professional players, or that gazing at screens are more interesting than sports. But overall, I think this can be strategically addressed within providing more physical education classes or offering more free sports facilities in public to children.

    To sum up, the government should encourage kids to exercise by giving them better physical education and put more sports facilities in use. At the same time, the cost on competitors can’t ignored, as they need to get better prepared for the big games.

    September 5, 2019 at 2:52 am

    Score: 62.1

    Many of the sentences exceed 20 words, so shorten/split them. I will send you screenshots to show errors/mistakes of your essay. Revise your essay and then re-submit it.

    Regards,

    Lin Qiu

     

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