It is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are younger rather than when you are older. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing It is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are younger rather than when you are older. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  • juri
    University: SUFE
    Nationality: China
    October 5, 2020 at 1:33 pm

    It is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are younger rather than when you are older. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

    The most obvious advantage of traveling when people are young is that people are in better physical condition and they don’t need to worry about health issues. Younger people are physically fitter, have fewer dietary requirements and can enjoy more types of activities like diving than older ones. For seniors, it is more difficult to cope with rigorous journeys like long flights and train tides. when they are traveling, old people have to spare more time to get refreshed and abandon some plans due to the restriction of energy.

    Besides, as people grow older, they have more responsibilities and commitments, which distract them from enjoyment. For instance, old people have to pay mortgages of their houses, ask for a leave, and get their stuff on hand settled. They have to make concession to their work and family. Traveling when they are young and careless, however, allows them to experience the trip and have a blast without considering about those troubling things or feeling guilty about neglecting responsibilities.

    What’s more, traveling when young gives people the opportunities to cultivate the ability to be independence and organizational. To be more specific, people will learn to manage their time and money effectively when planning. From example, they need to figure out the best itinerary, weigh pros and cons of different routes, book tickets and accommodation, check weather and prepare appropriate clothes. It’s really a challenge to arrange those things well at the first time, according to my own experience. Also, when traveling, young people will learn to take care of their belongings like money, tickets, and passports. Traveling in a new city means they have to stand on their own feet and be aware of the importance of fending for themselves. The earlier people take these lessons, the more benefits they reap.

    October 5, 2020 at 8:10 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 50% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    juri
    University: SUFE
    Nationality: China
    October 9, 2020 at 2:55 am

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    The most obvious advantage of traveling when people are young is that people are in good physical condition and they don’t need to worry about health issues. Younger people are  fitter, have fewer dietary requirements and enjoy more types of activities than older ones. For seniors, it is more difficult to cope with rigorous journeys like long flights and train rides. When they are traveling, senior people have to spare more time to get refreshed and abandon some plans due to energy restriction.

    Besides, as people grow older, they have more responsibilities and commitments, which prevent them from enjoyment. For instance, people in senior age have to pay mortgages of their houses, ask for a leave, and get their stuff on hand settled. They have to make a concession to their work and family. However, Traveling in a young and careless age allows people to experience the trip without considering those troubling things or feeling guilty about neglecting responsibilities.

    What’s more, traveling gives young people the opportunities to cultivate the ability to be independence and organizational. People will learn to manage their time and money effectively when planning. For example, they need to figure out the best itinerary, weigh pros and cons of different routes, book tickets and accommodation, check the weather, and prepare appropriate clothes. According to my own experience, it’s indeed a challenge to arrange those things well at the first time. Also, when traveling, young people will learn to take care of their belongings like money, tickets, and passports. Traveling in a new city means they have to stand on their own feet and be aware of the importance of fending for themselves. The earlier people take these lessons, the more benefits they reap.

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    October 13, 2020 at 4:26 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 40% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.