For the successful development of a country, it is more important for a government to spend money on the education of very young children (five to ten years old) than to spend money on universities. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. TOEFL Writing For the successful development of a country, it is more important for a government to spend money on the education of very young children (five to ten years old) than to spend money on universities. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  • TOEFL Victim
    University: Shanghai Maritime University
    Nationality: China
    April 14, 2020 at 6:12 am

    For the successful development of a country, it is more important for a government to spend money on the education of very young children (five to ten years old) than to spend money on universities. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

    People hold different arguments on spending money on education. Some propose investing in universities is more reasonable since hi-technology talents are indispensable. Others refute this view by emphasizing the importance of fundamental education. I agree on the latter. Here are my reasons.

    First, fundamental education is of great importance. Teenagers build their outlook on money,life and world during this period. Early education has a great influence on teenagers’ interests. Interests they found in their early age will help them decide on career somehow. Last summer, I took my little brother Wang to the Shanghai Science Museum. In the trip, he witnessed the Faraday Cage experiment. That’s when he started to show a great interest on physics. I bet the classical physical experiment triggers his passion for physics.

    Second,spending money on young children’s education are worthy. Since facilities in primary school are cheaper than laboratory equipment in university, we can have a profound effect on young children’s education with the same money. Last week, I saw some arguments on the Internet that money spent on introducing advanced facilities to universities can be used to build a whole kindergarten. This might be exaggerated. But we couldn’t deny only small amount of money may play an important role in fundamental education. Furthermore, from the perspective of parents, they would be more glad to see obvious progress on fundamental education.

    Third, almost all students have access to young-age education. However, universities are only available to some of them. Because of expensive tuition, family burden or other reasons, they are disable to enter into university let alone having a class. In this case, no matter how much spent on the university, there is nothing to do with them. We should consider the benefits of most people rather than the elites.

    In conclusion, government should spend money on education of young children. It is beneficial to teenagers’ growth and the development of school . Also, it meets the demands of most citizens.

    April 18, 2020 at 4:12 pm

    Score: 54.2

    Issues:

    1. About 15% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    TOEFL Victim
    University: Shanghai Maritime University
    Nationality: China
    April 19, 2020 at 5:27 am

    People hold different arguments on spending money on education. Some propose investing in universities is more reasonable since hi-technology talents are indispensable. Others refute this view by emphasizing the importance of fundamental knowledge. I agree with the latter. Here are my reasons.

    First, fundamental education is of great importance. Teenagers build their outlook on money, life, and world during this period. Early education has a great influence on teenagers’ interests. Interests they found in childhood will help them decide on a career goal somehow. Last summer, I took my little brother Wang to the Shanghai Science Museum. In the trip, he saw the Faraday Cage experiment. That’s when he started to show a great interest in physics. I bet the classical physical experiment triggers his passion for physics.

    Second, spending money on young children’s education is rewarding. Since facilities in primary school are cheaper than laboratory equipment in university, it is easier to have a profound effect on young children’s education with the same money. Last week, I saw some arguments on the Internet that the money spent on introducing advanced facilities in colleges was so much that we can use them to build several new kindergartens. The arguments might be exaggerated. But we couldn’t deny that small amount of money could play an important role in fundamental education. Furthermore, from the perspective of parents, they would be gladder to see obvious progress in fundamental education.

    Third, almost all students have access to young-age education. However, universities are only available to some of them. Because of expensive tuition and family burden, they are unable to enter the university let alone having a class. In this case, no matter how much spent on the university, there is nothing to do with them. We should consider the benefits of most people rather than the elites.

    In conclusion, we should spend money on early education. It is beneficial to teenagers’ growth and the development of our country. Also, it meets the demands of most citizens.

     

    April 24, 2020 at 10:43 pm

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