The restoration of old buildings in major cities in the world costs numerous government expenditures. This money should be used in new housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree?

TOEFL, IELTS, Personal Statement and CV Proofreading Services. IELTS Writing The restoration of old buildings in major cities in the world costs numerous government expenditures. This money should be used in new housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree?

  • 573636746@qq.com
    University: Vrije University Amsterdam
    Nationality: China
    April 15, 2020 at 9:30 am

    The restoration of old buildings in major cities in the world costs numerous government expenditures. This money should be used in new housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree?

    It is true that too much  the government’s expenditure goes on the repair  of old buildings, which incurs some complaints from the public. They strongly believe that this money should be employed in other fields such as building new houses and refurbishing roads.Personally, I disagree with this viewpoint.

    On the one hand, the argument that money is supposed to be poured into the houses and roads has a half point.To begin with ,due to the expansion of population,needs of houses increase dramatically,which leads to the gap between demand and supply  being enlarged.Nowadays ,the sky rocketing  housing prices has  haunted citizens for long time.Besides ,another problem related to traffic congestion  is a big challenge people have to confront.Along with the improving of life standard,owning a private car is no longer the wealthy people’s privilege.The number of cars soars in the recent years,causing the roads to bear heavy burden.In this way, public definitely hope to get financial support to mitigate these problems.

    Nevertheless ,old architectures can not only offer the value of historical records but also become  a big earner to the  local area.First of all ,these old architectures represent culture ,heritage and history .They serve to educate people about the city and even the nation.Secondly,they  act as landmarks or talking points for visitor overseas and domestic.The huge visitor traffic brings a lot of profits for  local people .One example is the Forbidden City, which is a place  that archaeologists and the public can have a insight into the stories happening in the palace.In addition,it attracts massive visitors from all over the word every day, which boosts the local economy .

    In conclusion ,there are good reasons why funds should be spent on houses and roads,but from my perspective the cost of old buildings is inevitable.

    April 15, 2020 at 4:41 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 100% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 60% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.