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  • June 21, 2020 at 6:40 pm

    In the past, there are [ were ] limited work[job  ] choices, so workers [people  ]usually do[ did ] similar job [work  ]for[ throughout ] their lives.[ The whole sentence is irrelevant to the topic. ] However, [today, people have expanded professional options because….  ]more and more jobs requiring people to finish various tasks are available with the rapid development of different industries. It[ unclear pronoun ] leads to a debate that whether workers are more satisfied with the work of different tasks comprared with the work of similar tasks.[use your own language and your own ideas  ] However, it is hard to judge and based on the ages of workers.[irrelevant  ]

    Yough workers are more satisfied about their work to finish various tasks for following reasons. First of all,  they can operate different programs in their work compared with past when workers do the same thing for a whole day. Repetition is what makes work dull easily, which drastically reduces satisfaction in work. What’s more, young workers are willing to learn different skills by working on various tasks everyday. For instance, thay can improve their organization skills when being asked to prepare for a significant event; Their communication skill will be improved when they have the chance to express our opinions in daily meetings. The achivement and progress inspire the young worker to work harder and gain more harvest, which absolutely makes them be more content with their work.

    On the contary, old worker are more likely to be satisfied with work containing different tasks. It is hard for them to learn different skills required by the job. For example, my 40-years old aunt complained she was required to learn the using official applications, e.g. Powerpoint,Word, Excel. It was so hard that she was considering quitting the job. They prefer to work of  repition tasks which are easier to accomplish.

    From what have been discussed, whether workers gain more satisfation from innovative or repetitive works depends on thrie ages and attitudes towards changing tasks.

    June 21, 2020 at 6:40 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 40% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    June 19, 2020 at 4:09 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 55% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. About 30% of the sentences are passive. Convert some of them into their active counterparts.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    June 19, 2020 at 2:46 pm

    Success is a lifelong pursuit for most people, and people are longing to know the formula for success. Obviously, [. During this academic journey,  ]certain immutable factors[ , ] including knowledge and creativity[,  ] matter in one’s way toward [remain crucial  ]accomplishment. What is more decisive to one’s success, the knowledge gained through study or creativity? People may give various opinions on this question. On balance, my favor goes to creativity.[In light of these two intangible yet important factors, I believe that creativity matters more than knowledge acquisition in determing one’s success.  ]

    Firstly, [world-changing inventions prove that  ]the power of creativity outweighs [  that of]basic knowledge according to successful inventions that change the world. For instance, Steve Jobs changed the way of communication with[ by developing ] his novel electronic devices. This means [  the ]full-screen multi-touch [ functionality ]on the iPhone, which differs from traditional physical keyboards [ in terms of user-friendliness ]. The innovation totally frees people from arduous typing work with a simple ‘click’. Evidently, the reason Apple can achieve extraordinary success is that they create attractive and advanced products that provide people with a brand fresh experience. Thus, [Apparently,  ]only by being inventive[, exemplified by Steve Job’s case,  ] can make[help  ] one stand out from his contemporaries[, which to some extent helps him to  ] and approach the success.

    Furthermore, creativity is an appealing characteristic that increases/[ expands ] the [  one’s]opportunities to win other people’s appreciation and support[in a professional setting  ]. In business[the corporate world  ], businessmen [ business executives ]regard creativity[ technological innovativeness of another organization ] as one/[a crucial  ] measurement standard to select companies to cooperate with[partners  ]. Therefore, [ This means that ]entrepreneurs with creative ideas can catch investors’ eyeballs.[ Take my uncle. ] For example, my uncle [ He once ]told me[that  ] his company used to bid for the contract on a new building[ a construction contract ]. His teams beat two other competitors because they[my uncle’s team  ] suggested (creatively adding specific ornaments to refresh old-fashioned design style, which totally blew the seller’s mind.)[ unclear ]

    [ On the other hand, ]It is undeniable that knowledge gained through study lay[ unclear ] the foundation for [ acquiring ]creative ideas. The Wright brothers could build airplanes on account of a basic understanding of aerodynamics. But expertise from education is useless if people do not know how to apply it into[ knowledge finds its association with ] practice.

    In conclusion, to achieve success in life, people have[ ought ] to be creative as the irreplaceable power of human brains drives the world.

     

    June 19, 2020 at 2:30 pm

    It is not uncommon to see roads filled with vehicles in modern society since cars have been playing a vital role in our daily commute. In that case, [ no logical connection with the prior sentence  ]some people anticipate that the number of cars will decline in the next two decades. In my perspective, however, the demand for vehicles will keep increasing regardless of other possible influences.

    To begin with, technology has developed at a fast pace, making the upgrading of car industry feasible[ bad topic sentence/write a topic sentence that directly responds to your thesis., i.e. Depletion of fossil fuels may lead to a significant reduction of cars  ]. That means [  that ]traditional cars will probably be replaced by new energy [new-energy   ]cars in the near future[  this does not support car use will reduce ]. (Thus, lacking fossil fuels and gases can not result in the decrease of output of vehicles.)[ unclear  ] For instance, Tesla is [,   ]the leader of new energy vehicles, which substitutes petroleum for electricity. So, storage of conventional fuels can not confine the mass production of new energy cars, which suggests that the total amount of vehicles will not reduce, it’s just that the ratio of traditional cars to new energy vehicles changes.

    Additionally, opponents who are against my point of view consider that many people nowadays are suffering from financial problems. They argue that it is more and more difficult to get a car since people’s money has been used to pay back debts. But fortunately, the government has made a statement on cutting down price of new energy cars in recent years. In order to advocate the use of renewable sources, governments published many policies, including providing special allowances for citizens.

    Last but not least, there is an increasing demand for vehicles among young generations. Old vehicles can not satisfy their special taste. Young generations are looking for something which contains unique and fashionable elements. High-tech cars are just in line with the requirements. Admittedly, public transportation is becoming more convenient and effective than ever, which seems that there is no need for a private car. But in big cities, public transportation can often be crowded. People have to experience discomfort in relatively narrow space.

    In summary, people’s enthusiasm about purchasing cars will by no means fade away in the future.

    June 19, 2020 at 12:18 pm

    Traffic jams are [jam is   ] worldwide problems[, which occurs   ] especially in big cities like [ such as  ]New York, Beijing, [ and  ]Tokyo, and so on. So[ As such, I agree with the proposed policy of  ] taking a charge from drivers in a [ during  ]busy time [ since this practice  ]has benefits for city transportation, because this policy could improve city traffic[ transportation   ] efficiency. Moreover, It may [  and ]decrease traffic [  noise ]pollution and noise.

    Firstly, taking a fee can decrease cars on the streets during rush hours. Imagine what people do when the traffic is heavy and they need to pay for using the streets. At this moment[ Imagine this scenario  ], they may change their schedules and choose a free period[to use the road when it is free   ]. For instance, a girl wants to have a date or hang out with her friends, and she prefers to select after 2 p.m. which traffic is moving quickly at this period. Moreover,

    [Additionally,   ]some people are unwilling to pay an extra fee, which may stimulate them to [ some people would  ]use public transportation. It [,which could   ]also helps to decrease the number of private cats on the streets.

    Secondly, as I mentioned above, people will lower the frequency of using cars and take public transportation. That may help to reduce traffic noise and [ other forms of  ]pollution because the noise of hoots is also cut when the traffic jams are reduced. Let alone there are abundant people would take public transportation, traffic pollution will also decrease. Furthermore, some people buy a car out of convenience. If [ if  ]using their[ a  ] car in rush time will pay [ involves  ]an extra fee, a lot of people do not continue [are unlikely   ]to purchase a car. And fewer private cars means less use of [ , thereby saving  ]oil[and better protecting the environment.   ], which makes a great effort to environmental protection.

    [  In light of my discussion noted above, collecting ]Taking a fee from drivers when traffic jams are heavy may is not [be  ]the best/[optimal  ] way to control the traffic jam, but it [  this measure can ]actually brings [ bing ]some advantages for the[ to ] citizens and [ perhaps would ]decreases the degree of [alleviate  ]traffic jams in some way[to some extent  ].

    June 18, 2020 at 2:16 pm

    Score: 53.5

    Should a governor [ wrong word/ it differs from a public official  ] act according to the highest ethical and moral norms all the time? From my point of view, (we should not always ask officials to do so. ) [ irrelevant/the focus is on words and acts of public officials; it has nothing to do with how you act.   ] This is because minor moral abnormalities are tolerable. Moreover, in some circumstances, maintaining the (highest standards) [ unclear  ] will [ grammatical error  ] conflict with people’s interests.

    (Admittedly, some people may agree with this “issue” [ wrong word  ]unclear .) Sticking to the highest moral standards is beneficial to the public. [ factual error  ] Due to the authority of public figures, [ bad logical connection  ] they can function as moral models for citizens. Imagine that governors [ wrong word  ] maintain the standard norms in their behavior, such as not talking dirty or smoking in public. Then citizens are likely to behave similarly in the [article error   ] manner, (regulate their behaviors, and reach a higher moral level) [ unclear  ] . As a result, (asking for officials behaving civilized will benefit the whole society) [shift of emphasis   ] .

    However, we cannot ask officials to act perfectly, because everyone has weaknesses. Small ethical or moral mistakes will not [ factual error  ] turn a great leader into a notorious one. Consider Napoleon, the celebrated revolutionist in France. His greed for pursuing power, a moral imperfection, did not limit [wrong verb   ] him to become an effective leader. Instead, it was his brevity and his significant contribution to France that impressed people. Consequently, it is reasonable not to expect governors to behave according to the highest norms. [ repetition  ]

    Moreover, the highest standards sometimes contradict to [wrong preposition   ] most people’s interests. For example, at the highest ethical level, governors [  wrong word ] should forbid killing animals, since animals are our friends. But it is ridiculous if we human beings are not permitted to eat meat. Similarly, a leader may holds [grammatical error   ] that terrorists should not be condemned to death since everyone was born equal. [This [   unclear pronoun] seemly virtuous order will cause great disasters to society. ] [unclear   ] In these circumstances, keeping the [ article error  ] highest moral standards is detrimental to citizens. Hence, governors [ wrong word  ] should not be expected to do so.

    To sum up, it is not required that( governors should maintain the best ethical and moral standards) [ repetition  ] , despite their positive influence on regulating people [word form error   ] behaviors. We can tolerate a great governor [ wrong word  ] to have small moral mistakes [repetition   ] . Whether or not keeping the highest standards also depends on (their parallelism with citizens’ interests) [ unclear  ] .

    June 18, 2020 at 2:02 pm

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. About 30% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.
    2. Lots of grammatical errors;
    3. Many pronouns are unclear;
    4. Lots of articles are wrong used.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    June 18, 2020 at 1:56 pm

    Invalid [ essay topic not provided]

    June 18, 2020 at 12:46 pm

    Score: 75

    The line chart gives data on the Chinese and American birth rates [ in China and the United States ]from 1920 to 2000. It is evident that [ Schematically,  ]both nations saw an overall drop in natality, with highs during the 1950s.

    Increasing from 10% in 1920 to 15% in 1935, China’s birth rate then plummeted to 5% in the 1940s. This was followed by an exponential climb, hitting a high of 20% in 1950. {However, the rate of babies born in China was in decline from the highest point, reaching a low point of well under 5%.}[ unclear; need to specify time period ]

    In/During the same period, the US birth rate stayed in the vicinity of 12% from 1920 to 1940, before dipping sharply to a low of just under 5% in 1945. The next five years saw [ a ]sharp growth to 15% ,[ 15%, ] followed by a consistent fall to the end point[ endpoint ] at 7% in 2000.

    In conclusion, it is notable that the natalities in the two countries were quite similar throughout the (whole period)[study period  ] ,yet the gap[of xxx  ] between the two countries widened after 1950.

    June 18, 2020 at 11:52 am

    I won’t work on your essay unless grammatical/logical errors are significantly reduced. Besides, use your own words to write your own ideas.

    June 18, 2020 at 11:45 am

    Score: ungraded

    Issues:

    1. Numerous grammatical errors;
    2. The topic sentence for 2nd/3rd paragraphs fails to directly echo the essay question. Rephrase the two topic sentences.
    3. About 55% of the sentences exceed 20 words. Shorten/split them.

    I will send you screenshots to illustrate specific problems/errors.

    June 18, 2020 at 11:39 am

    wait for another version

    June 17, 2020 at 10:19 pm

    An overwhelming number of people need to find somewhere to live in modern society. Some people prefer houses, while others tend to choose apartments. As such[ wrong transitory word  ], citizens had better choose apartments because benefits exceed the demerits[ wrong word  ]. [ Irrelevant/you need to discuss the advantages/disadvantages of living in houses rather than apartments.   ]

    There are sound reasons why people prefer houses (especially for the wealthy)[misplaced/confusing   ]. For one thing, (self-construction mode)[ unclear  ] allows [ wrong word/ allow…to  ]people more freedom for their accommodation. That is because they can figure out garden designs and interior (creations)[ wrong word  ] on their own. In this way, people could (fulfill emptiness)[ unclear  ], lift their moods, and enrich cultural life. For another, houses (play a more significant role in promoting)[wordy/use one verb   ] economic progress. To be specific, the whole gamut from furnitures[ word form error  ], plants to paintings are required during the decoration process. That brings a huge influx of income to relevant industries and [ wrong coordination word  ]stirs economic growth.

    People should comply with city planning and live in apartments for several reasons. The first is that the security of residents counts. If people can build whatever style as their will does, the quality cannot be ensured.[ grammatical error with subjunctive voice  ] The government, [  Government ]however, can sponsor the project and due diligence to its safety[ unclear  ]. Besides, accomodating people to high buildings can vacate much land in the city . [ spacing error  ]It[ unclear pronoun  ] follows that these precious land resources could extend their limited use and (fortify the nation’s welfare)[ unclear  ]. (Also, workers away from concrete jungles may suffer from inconvenient transportation.)[  unclear ]

    In conclusion, it is a plausible way for people to construct houses for residential use. However, we can entrust the state to build apartments due to their safety and efficiency.

    June 17, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    Invalid [You need to complete the revision of one essay prior to submitting another one.]